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House rules

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Samr, Feb 12, 2011.

  1. AlmostGaunt

    AlmostGaunt
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    I have lived in a few party houses over the years. Now that we are all old and settled, its just basic stuff - if you break something minor, tell me and I'll deal with it. If you accidentally SET MY FUCKING CARPET ON FIRE just before a rent inspection, you will be paying the $500 to have the carpet replaced. Standard stuff, although I vary on the 'leave undrunk alcohol' rule. If there is significantly less than half a bottle remaining, sure, keep it. If it's more, I'm taking it - I drink 6/7 nights a week, and just can't afford to lose that much booze and still spend my life in a drunken haze.

    Our most important house rule now: you pay your bets. Betting is the lifeblood of my household. If you drunkenly offer a $1k bet, you better pay up $1k. If you bet someone 10 shots, you better pay those 10 shots. No exceptions. Ever. You are allowed, and occasionally encouraged, to mark up shots on the sheet we have tacked to the wall for this reason - no-one will call you a pussy for knowing your own limits. However, you damn well better pay them in a timely fashion (1 month), or you will be mercilessly taunted until you pay up or leave.

    I have plenty of booze and smoke on hand. I will always offer, and you are always free to ask. However... a fair use policy applies. It irritates me when I put a half oz out and it's gone by morning.

    Some of the less reputable houses I've lived in, though, had to have a stricter set of rules. Notable ones:
    1). The number 1 golden rule, that will not be broken: DO NOT DEAL FROM MY FUCKING HOUSE. Don't invite dealers to my house. Don't quit your job and leave that as your only option for paying rent. don't 'just have a friend stopping by for a minute'. Just don't. (Side story: we once forcibly evicted the brother of my then-girlfriend's housemate from their premises. He had fucked up, bad, and owed some people $30k he didn't have. And they knew where he lived, which was in the same house as my girlfriend. I was not amused. Incidentally, that guy had to move back home with his mother. He ordered a pill press from the internet, and his mother got called home from work to witness the police raiding her house.) Seriously. This is one of the few triggers that will move me to berserk rage. The first place I lived in during Uni had its roof set on fire because one of the fucking idiot housemates had ripped someone off. Another acquaintance (maybe 5'6 girl) was beaten in a home invasion - baseball bat to the skull, she went to hospital and is now partially sighted in one eye - because she lived with her fuckwit dealer boyfriend. Never, never, never.

    Man. Remembering all this stuff has made me incredibly grateful for my current housemates/friends. Just realized I haven't had any of these issues for 2.5 years. Not a single argument, not even a raised voice. I think I'll buy a carton for them on the way home.
     
  2. Mossimo

    Mossimo
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    Here are the set of beer pong rules my friends and I use when playing:

    1. Commencement of first game shall be decided by eye-to-eye shootout. Winners of each game shall throw first in each succeeding game.

    2. Thou shalt not complete thy turn until thou hast consumed that which thine is due.

    3. Thou shalt not extend thine elbow beyond established elbow line.

    4. No ball made shall count for more than one cup.

    5. Bouncing ball shall be subject to swattage.

    6. Thou shalt not molest a ball in flight.

    7. Any cup spilled by participants shall be retrieved, refilled and consumed and not replaced.

    8. Any ball thrown shall be in play until completely clear of playing surface.

    9. Balls-out-Beirut shall be strictly prohibited unless initiated by Michael Roy “Doughboy” Richards.

    10. Shall it come to pass, that in one legal turn both balls come to rest within the confines of a regulation Solo cup, said balls shall be returned from whence they came and a new turn shall commence.

    11. Shall it come to pass that both members of a team successfully make their opponent’s final cup, the game shall be deemed over with no opportunity for rebuttal.

    12. Rebuttals may lead only to overtime.

    13. Thou shalt not befoul opposing team’s beer.

    14. Each participant shall be responsible for proper ball hygiene.

    15. Each team shall have the opportunity for one re-rack per game.

    16. Overtime rules: Winning team shall have the first throw in overtime. Overtime shall consist of 1 beer distributed evenly amongst three cups. Overtime 2 shall consist of 2 beers distributed evenly amongst three cups. Overtime 3 shall consist of 3 beers distributed evenly amongst three cups. Overtime 4 shall consist of 1 beer distributed evenly amongst one cup. Sudden death.

    17. Bitches Blow.

    • Violations of any rule shall result in a one-cup penalty.

    • Any grievances made or objections to above-listed rules shall be ruled upon under the jurisdictional authority of the Pinery Beer Pong Regulatory Associational Committee for Excellence in Pinery Beer Pong (PBPRACEPBP).

    • The above inalienable right to rule was granted by the Core Four Commission under subsection 77.73.65.58.54.36.33.21.14.7.5.3
     
  3. MoreCowbell

    MoreCowbell
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    I absolutely hate that 'bitches blow, dudes finger' stuff. You intentionally fuck with a ball that's going in at my house, and you're drinking it and then another for being a little shit.
     
  4. BL1Y

    BL1Y
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    If I blow the ball out of the cup, I get two free beers? How is this a penalty?
     
  5. MoreCowbell

    MoreCowbell
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    See, that's why I always liked beer pong. Everyone wins.