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Hold my man card, I need a drink

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Revengeofthenerds, May 23, 2014.

  1. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    AskMen did an article about the "Top 10 Drinks Real Men Don't Order."

    And they also did one about the "Top 10 Drinks for Guys."

    Personally, I consider any "guy" drink to be one with alcohol in it. After all, the idea is to figure out a taste you like, and then to find that taste with a high alcohol content. I'm mainly a gin and bourbon guy. I don't care if it's high end or rot gut, if it's am or pm -- I want it neat, and I want it three fingers high. And keep it coming. (Now that I typed that out, kinda sound like an alcoholic... ah well...). But I also like to switch it up sometimes. Some drinks are just damn good, regardless of what is in it, or what stereotype it has. I'll still return home with some Boones Farm Strawberry Hill once in a while, and Mikes Hard Lemonade is still great in the summer.

    John F. Kennedy famously loved his strawberry daiquiris. I'm starting off tonight with more than a few Bud Light Mang-o-Ritas. Am I comparing myself to a president? Not intentionally. Am I using presidential status as a reason to feel better about myself for what is essentially alcoholic "orange drink"? Yeah, kinda. Do I abso-fucking-lutely love it though? You bet your sugar-rimmed ass I do!

    Focus: If you're a guy, what "female drinks" are you normally to embarrassed to admit you enjoy? If you're a girl, what "man drinks" are your Achilles heel?

    Alt. Focus: Where do you draw the gender line for drinks, or do you?

    Alt. Alt. Focus: Discuss the AskMen lists. Make your own "Top 10 Drinks Men Don't Order" and "Top 10 Manly Man Drinks."
     
  2. Juice

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    I'm a sucker for sangria. Nothing better than getting a good sangria buzz on a hot day by a pool. Not sure if it's traditionally a feminine drink, but I can make a mean homemade batch with the right ingredients.

    Overall I don't really judge that much on drink preferences. Whatever works for you is fine with me. I have a buddy who is a huge jock, built like the Statue of David, a huge MMA fan, and he orders Appletinis. Don't get me wrong, in our group of friends he gets ridiculed mercilessly (in a jovial way), but he doesn't care. He likes what he likes and I appreciate that.

    Bump.
     
  3. Crown Royal

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    Sangria is awesome.

    Anthything that ends with "tini"and doesn't begin with "Mar" is not okay for a man to order. If you order this than you are a gayfag.
     
  4. shimmered

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    except that many of those drinks are super strong and really taste really really really fucking good. So drinking them is super easy and they knock you on your ass.


    I don't judge anyone for drinks...because booze is all about the fun.

    There is one exception - Six Points Brewing has a beer called Apollo. It's supposed to be a Bavarian Wheat but it tastes exactly like my brain imagines rotten kangaroo piss to smell and it's fucking disgusting. If you tell me you like that beer, I'm going to assume you have malfunctioning tastebuds or a deep sense of self loathing.
     
  5. toddamus

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    Is a mojito a woman's drink? I don't think it is, but if so, I don't give a fuck. Nothing is better than sitting poolside with a nice cool, fresh, minty mojito.
     
  6. Omegaham

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    I love me some fruity drinks. I love margaritas, pina coladas, Seagram's Escapes, daquiris, whatever.

    I don't usually drink "manly" drinks, but it's due to the fact that I can't control how fast I drink, and drinking bourbon neat is an easy way to ensure that I pass out at 10:00 PM. Girly drinks tend to be lower in alcohol, so I can drink them without worrying about getting plastered too quickly.

    Otherwise, at bars and parties, I'm usually drinking light beer. Drinking Sierra Nevada or hard liquor generally ends up with Sharpie on my face or getting kicked out of a bar for sleeping.

    I am not a small man, so this gets me a lot of ridicule from friends. I don't really care, though, as the alternative is getting ridiculed even more for falling asleep on the bar.
     
  7. Tim

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    Pro tip ( I used to be in the industry): Frozen drinks have less alcohol than their mixed compatriots. You need less alcohol to make it freeze. Making less bang for the buck.


    I'm into cheap red wine and silver tequila these days. Little chance of it being diluted or tainted by anything.
     
  8. shimmered

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    Agreed. Especially if it's properly made. AND if it has strawberries in it.
     
  9. CharlesJohnson

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    I love a pina colada. You know who doesn't like pineapple and coconut? Nobody. I would never order one because it is a waste of $7 for a glass full of cold sugar. Sangria is delicious. Call a Spaniard a pussy for drinking it, see if he soccer kicks your scrote. I also like daiquiris, mojitos, and drink beer from a straw when my beard hair is 3 months long. I don't give a shit. Go back to playing with yourself in the corner.

    The gender line for drinks is an apple-tini. I want to say a guy can order an apple-tini, but it is just too gay. Gay guys won't even drink that shit. They'd call you a faggot then take turns fucking your mouth. And you'd let them too, because you knew they were right. It is pretty much cold apple pucker. You just can't spin that into any sort of masculine superiority. In fact, as shitty as the bars here are, I'm having trouble thinking of more than one place that would actually make you one. It is the absolute most loathed drink in the book.

    The dumbest manly drinks are shit like the Four Horsemen, or any kind of King of The Bar Shot. 4 kinds of whiskey in one glass. Another version calls for 3 whiskeys and a quarter shot of Cuervo. You're just going to vomit that up. Whether you make a puke waterfall on your white shirt before or after trying to punch someone is the real question.
     
  10. Aetius

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    I don't have a line. Drink what tastes good. My usual posion:

    -Apple Cider when it's available.
    -If cider isn't available, then beer if it's a casual evening, or rum&coke/sprite&vodka if I'm trying to get drunk. I'm not a huge beer fan, but something like a pilsner or a chocolate stout is palatable.
    -If I'm at an all inclusive resort in Mexico, it's mudslides 24/7.
     
  11. shimmered

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    After BrotherB's first tour in Iraq, he and his buddy went on a cruise with the buddy's family.
    Buddy was occupying their room, so BrotherB decided to go to the bar. Looking at drink menu, he decides to go through everything he's never had.
    Has a Blue Hurricane. Decides that's a shitty drink that doesn't taste bad but doesn't taste good enough to order ever again on purpose.
    Has a martini. Decides James Bond is a badass because he drinks those and likes them, because they're disgusting.
    Has a Cosmo. Puts it in same category as Blue Hurricane.
    Has a two or three other drinks. Hits upon the Appletini.
    Holy fuckballs. That is DELICIOUS. Has 7 more Appletinis. Is like drinking a green jolly rancher. Is happy because YUMMY.
    Bartender becomes slightly concerned because BrotherB isn't exhibiting signs of drinking or being drunk, and is wondering how he's still upright. BrotherB assures him that all is well.

    As BrotherB decides to close out the night and return to room, he stands up. And immediately melts down to the floor.

    Bartender breaths audible sigh of relief, realizing that BrotherB is in fact human and NOT a terminator.
    BrotherB tells bartender to call Buddy down to the bar because getting back to his room is gonna be a BIIIITCH.

    BrotherB gets to room, with Buddy's help, and decides that vomiting sounds like a good idea.

    That was in 2006. To this day (two tours in Iraq and a few other situations later), an Appletini is one of BrotherB's favorite drinks...and there's no one on God's green earth who would meet that man and think peckerpuffer.

    Aetius - your mudslides are my lava flows when I'm in Hawaii. Holy good yummy things.
     
  12. Juice

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    God frozen mudslides are so good. Usually places that made them tend to skimp on the booze a bit, at least in my experience. But still awesome nonetheless. Or any frozen drink for that matter, given the right circumstances and location.

    When I was in college our spring break cruise stopped in the Dominican Republic and we hopped a bus to some cruise-designated resort area. There was a bar that was making a special frozen cocktail in a half pineapple as the cup. Except for about 5 of us, every single person of the 35 people in our group that went had one of these. And every single one of them got sick. They failed to realize that the frozen part of their delicious cocktail comes from ice made from local water. Oops.

    Glad I stuck with bottled beer.
     
  13. Crown Royal

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    Rum cocktails are my Milk And Honey. Especially mojitos and Floridita Daquiris which are my two favourite drinks, period.
     
  14. toddamus

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    This thread is making me want to go out to the grocery store at 8:30 on a Monday to get the things I need for a proper Mojito. Dam I'm craving one right now.


    [​IMG]

    This is kind of an interesting link. How many of these have you guys tried? <a class="postlink" href="http://www.drinkinginamerica.com/the-man-cave-5-girly-drinks-you-need-to-try/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.drinkinginamerica.com/the-ma ... ed-to-try/</a>

    Kinda shocked they listed a margarita as a girly drink.
     
  15. silway

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    I really have no idea what is a "guy's drink." I rarely drink. When I do I go with rum and coke, screwdriver, cape codder, and sex on the beach. I assume one of those is probably somehow considered "girly."
     
  16. Crown Royal

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    "Guy's Drinks":

    Whiskey Sangaree
    Manhattan
    Harvey Wallbanger
    Sidecar (another fave of mine)
    Dry Martini
    Tom Collins
    Old Fashioned
    Whiskey sour
    Any shot that makes you do push-ups between drinks

    ...feel free to add. To further give props to Sangria, everyone here should have at least ONE Spanish friend to party with on holidays.
     
  17. sisterkathlouise

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    There is a drink I love that is essentially a gin gimlet, but with a drop of rose water and splash of cocchi americano, and it is the best thing ever. I don't think it has a name, because I think my friend and I made it up when we were drunk, but you should all probably try it. It tastes a little girlie and flowery, but even some of the manly men with their bourbon and cigars go for them sometimes.
     
  18. Crown Royal

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    This is how to make Sangria:

    2 tbsp Honey
    Bottle of red wine (I don't give a shit, II don't know wine)
    17 orange juice
    17 oz red grape juice
    1 oz Spanish brandy OR Licor 43
    Half an orange, sliced thin as possible
    Half an apple sliced thin
    Half a lemon sliced thin
    1-2 pound of ice cubes

    1) pour in red wine, orange juice, grape juice.
    2) dissolve honey in the mix.
    3) Add the Licor 43/Brandy and sliced fruit. Stir.
    4) chill for at least 24 hours
    5) add 1-2 pound of ice cubes before serving. It will get downed. FAST.
     
  19. toddamus

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    How about a beer? Nothing more manly than pulling up a bar chair after a hard day and grabbing a cold one.
     
  20. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Besides the sarcastic one, those were all cocktails. Of course there's just straight business drinks like scotch, brandy, port, beers that guys without popped collars drink, etc.