Here mom, I got you a bowling ball! With my name on it!

As Christmas nears, and I'm in the process of finishing up holiday shopping, I check off names from my list. Easy, super easy, easy easy, etc. Except my mother. Every single fucking year I have no idea what to get her. I ask my coworkers what they got for their mothers, and it's no help. My girlfriend is getting her mom a personalized snuggie and there is no way in hell I'm doing that too. Last year I ended up getting her a fairly expensive Gordon Ramsey cookbook that she didn't use and didn't particularly like.

I'm sure I'm in the same boat as some of the rest of you, so let's take a moment to not be sefish fucks. Rather than worrying about what you want, tell us what you're getting for your family members and friends in order to spread ideas and uhh, help me out here.

 

Does she like coffee? I am getting my mom one of those 1 cup coffee makers (put the disc in and out comes delicious coffee.)

They make a nice single cup for a person when you don't want to down 6 cups because that is what your old coffee maker makes.

 

I sent my entire family my own Christmas list this year, complete with internet links to the best prices for what I asked for. I explained that I was doing this in hopes that other family members would follow suit and circulate their own Christmas lists, particularly my mother, who has received a gift certificate for a manicure/pedicure from me for the last five fucking years. I half jokingly told her that if she didn't let me know about at least two items for Christmas that I wounldn't get her anything. She finally conceded and asked for a smaller mixing bowl for her Kitchen Aid stand mixer and a cordless phone that has two handsets. This process started in November. My sister asked for me to give her money for some makeup that she already purchased. Fair enough. My dad was easy to shop for. I found a screaming deal on some breatheable waders and sent them to him before Thanksgiving.

 

Target stuff that she would want that she wouldn't necessarily pay for for herself.

Without knowing anything about here, or your budget these recommendations are necessarily general, but:

Ideas:
Voucher to a day spa
DVD Box Set of her favourite show
A year's/month's/day's worth of house cleaning
Tickets to a show/musical
Magazine subscription

Also: While the horse has bolted for this year, maybe you can move to a Secret Santa system next year. It removes all the shopping stress from Xmas, and if you are older, it is more about hanging out with your family rather than the stuff you get anyway.

 

Just tell your mom that you're now a desolate bum with no finances and you need some money to stay afloat. She will feel happy that she can still play an important role in your life; best mom present ever.

Focus: A handwritten letter goes a long way. Especially if you tape money, theater tickets, or gift cards to the back of it. Extra points if you place an early family photo alongside a more current one with the words, "thanks for helping me grow into the man I am today."

 

NEUDGE

Good point. Mainly I just wanted to know what other people got for their moms and I'd steal their ideas, but if you tools want to help me specifically I'm not going to stop you.

Anyone know how Sirius/XM works with regards to in-home radios? My mom got it in her car and recently bought a lifetime subscription. I'm thinking maybe a receiver for the house? Of course that does mean I have to set it up for her... I hope to god she'd use it...

Sadly, I'm not a desolate bum. I don't know how or why, but I actually have money. I don't make that much and I spend $50 - $100 a week on beer and constantly buy books. It's fucking weird.

 

My mother is retired so she spends a lot of her time shopping nowadays and therefor buying stuff she doesn't need, essentially the stuff I would buy her for Christmas.

I can hound her for months about different devices and cooking/gardening implements, jewelry etc and get nowhere. My sister on the other hand selects random shit I would never think of (such as snow-shoes this year) and will get rave reviews.

So I finally smartened up and just ask my sister what to buy my mother, or I'll ask my mother's best friend since they're shopping pals. Cuts to the chase and gets results.

 

I'm thinking of getting some professional pictures done of my sister and me and putting them in a nice frame for my mom. I don't think she really has any recent pictures of either of us, and that's about all I can think of.

She's also an avid reader but I'm always hesitant to buy books for her because you can never really tell what someone else will like.

 

Sherwood,

you can get adapters for XM/Sirus that broadcasts at a FM frequency like 88.1. My parents have one and they LOVE it. If your mom like listening to music and hates commercials then this is the way to go

 

My mom doesn't celebrate Christmas so I don't have this problem.

For mother in law person I go to Ross and buy her`an $8 sweater and pretend it is all the fashion. Haha.

 

Call Sirius and make sure that you don't need a new account for a new device. She may have a lifetime subscription for the one in her car, but if she has to buy a unit for the house, I think she'll need a subscription for that one.

The only way to get around that is if she has a portable Sirius radio (stiletto or something) that will allow her to broadcast Sirius to an FM frequency in the car and the house.

 

My sister is a vegetarian who's off at her first year of college.

She will be getting B12 and Iron supplements from me, the coolest older brother in the world.

 

My mother is a vegan who will not use anything from countries that abuse animals (goodbye anything from China). Buying her presents is torture.

 

I got my mother this last year, and she LOVES it. Make sure to get her a box of single-serving coffee other than the one that comes with the device, though--the ones that come with the device taste like burnt taint.

Here are things my Mom always needs (like, every year):

-Socks
-Pajamas
-Measuring spoons/cups
-Egg timer (she goes through about 3 a year. She gets one every Christmas, Mothers Day, and birthday and STILL has issues keeping them workable)
-Interesting bundt cake pans
-Cookbooks
-Interesting household gadgets/machines that she wouldn't ever be able to justify getting for herself if she were spending the money (Panini maker, label maker, digital photograph printer)
-iTunes giftcards

My brother seems to be as well-meaning as you are, Sherwood, but he always misses the mark too. Then I let him in on The Secret: Get her anything. Literally, anything. Then when she opens it, get REALLY FUCKING EXCITED and babble on about how much she's going to LOVE IT, and how cool you thought it would be for y'all to use/experience your gift together. Make sure you sell it hard, but if you get ecstatic enough and actually follow through on your enthusiastic wishes to spend time with her doing something different than usual...your dear Mommy will cherish your gift beyond all others.

Do it well, and she'll be saying things like "Remember that time you got me the panini maker and then you tried to invent a panini for me? Oh Lord, it was gross but we had so much fun together! That was a great gift, honey!" for years to come.

 

I got my mom a pair of lululemon pants. She exercises 6 days a week so she's in dire need of quality workout gear. I love lulu because it's cute, durable and makes your ass look really good. Also, they have complimentary hemming for the garment's life. Love it!

 

A grandchild usually goes over pretty well.

 

My parents have enough money to get what they want at this point in their life, so I don't play the guessing game. I just buy and cook a huge fancy ass meal. Then hang out with them for the day. I don't get to see them that much, so something from the heart and my presence is more than enough to make them continue to love me.

 

I have a small family. Like, extremely small. This year I only had to buy three Christmas presents: mom, stepdad and girlfriend.

They were all pretty tough, though, especially since I'm unemployed and I cringe every time I withdraw from my rapidly dwindling bank account.

My mom is the definition of a workaholic. Her typical day includes waking up at 5 a.m., working out, going to work until 6 p.m., playing tennis for an hour, and then spending the rest of her "time off" checking her corporate e-mail account. Luckily she dropped a pretty heavy hint this year ("Buy me this. I want it and I don't want your broke ass spending too much money.") and I got her a copy of Andre Agassi's autobiography, Open.

My stepdad is retired and does nothing but smoke cigars and ride his motorcycle. He camps out at rallies a lot, and I know for a fact he only has handheld flashlights, so I bought him a Black Diamond Spot headlamp (http://blackdiamondequipment.com/en-us/shop/mountain/lighting/spot). I'm pretty satisfied with this one; anyone who has spent time camping knows how essential a good headlamp is.

I've been with my girlfriend for a little less than two months, meaning I had to get her something more than a card but I didn't have to break the bank, either. I went with a simple, elegant, on sale diamond necklace.