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Hell, at that price, I'll take two!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by $100T2, Jul 20, 2010.

  1. $100T2

    $100T2
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    Hammacher Schlemmer is selling a 2 man submarine that, like your sister, goes down 1000'. Sorry, the sister thing just came out.

    And, it's only $2,000,000.00! Buy yours today!

    And I can't lie, if I had that kind of money, I'd have a motherfucking 2 man submarine.

    FOCUS: What are your favorite things from Hammacher Schlemmer, Brookstone, or Skymall? Ever bought anything there? What's the craziest shit there?

    ALT FOCUS: What would you do with a personal submarine?

    EDIT (Frylock): Changed focus.
     
  2. DrFrylock

    DrFrylock
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    The White

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  3. Sherwood

    Sherwood
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    This reminds me of that episode of get a life where Chris ordered a bathtub submarine from the money he earned on his paper route, and it took him 20 years before it was actually delivered, then him and his dad got stuck in it, and the shower head broke off, and it was funny.


     
    #3 Sherwood, Aug 20, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  4. Frank

    Frank
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    I'm seriously considering buying this and putting it in my cousin's garden as a joke.
     
  5. Primer

    Primer
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    Masturbate at 1000' ft, then at 999' ft, then at 998'...
     
  6. kuhjäger

    kuhjäger
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    Alt Focus: I would attach a fishing rod somehow and go after deep sea fish right where they live.

    Focus:
    [​IMG]

    Fuck this thing. World largest piece of shit crossword puzzle.

    You need a fucking road map to find 687083 down.

    (the answer is woodcock)
     
  7. lostalldoubt86

    lostalldoubt86
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  8. Obviously5Believer

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    2 mil for a piece of shit tin can submarine? They must think people with money will buy anything. For 2 mil I'd buy a fucking yacht that can hold a lot more than 2 people. I'm thinking drugs, liquor, and bitches. I'll be chilling in my pimp ass yacht while you're crammed in a mail-order submersible. I'm pretty sure you could look for a decommissioned warship and pick one of those up from a broke country for 2 million. When I get tired of just seeing the top of the ocean I'll get into scuba diving or just pay someone with a real submarine to take me down. 1000 feet? Six hour max charge? I want a seaworthy vessel not a RC toy.
     
  9. Veovis

    Veovis
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    We get this catalog at the office. Now I think Obviously5Believer has missed one small detail. It's a motherfucking submarine......fuck road head, I'm gonna give her some sea men.

    You know who buys a 2 million dollar toy sub? The people who look at 2 million like you look at 50 cent beer night at the pub.

    Trust me, they already have the yacht, this is what they putter around in when not doing rails off the girls on the yacht ass.


    On the small scale though my boss did get me the voice controll R2-D2. As long as it's quiet it works. However they did program it to get pissy so when a 2 and 4 year old yell numerous conflicting commands it simply whips out it's vagina and stops listening to anything anyone says. Though it can be fun. Ask him about Dart Vader and he freaks out.
     
  10. dixiebandit69

    dixiebandit69
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    SHEEEEEEIIIIITTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Look here folks, (this is a legitimate offer) for the paltry sum of $100,000 (American), I will build you a submarine that can hold more than two people. I can weld, and I can read blueprints/wiring and hydraulic schematics, and if you can do that, you can make a submarine. And if I can't do some of the work, I damn sure know guys who can.
    I'm not going to lie to you, it probably won't look as pretty as that thing, but you can have your submarine for a lot less than that.
    Anyone who buys that thing is a complete tool, and shit like that makes me wish that the government would reinstate the luxury tax.
     
  11. MrPrime

    MrPrime
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    I don't know about things that I would want from them, but we probably should include things most likely to cause a lawsuit or injuries into the mix.


    And on that note, I bring you The Spinning Tow ball. If this doesn't cause damage to who ever would get in this enclosed ball of death, I don't know what would
     
  12. dense

    dense
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    [​IMG]
    Focus: While it may not be the most ostentatious or expensive product on skymall, it is totally fucking ridiculous. I have two dogs and if I ever bought one of those things for either one of them I'd hope they would leave.

    Edit: Or bite me in the fucking face.
     
  13. konatown

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    [​IMG]

    I misinterpreted this thread. Totally.
     
  14. Veovis

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    I'll raise this <a class="postlink" href="http://www.backyardtoystore.com/shop/index.php?act=viewProd&productId=283" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.backyardtoystore.com/shop/in ... ductId=283</a>

    though it looks fun...it can't end well. Well not with the boat drivers i know
     
  15. Obviously5Believer

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    Why do I get the sense that the inside of your jerry-rigged submarine would look less like this:
    [​IMG]
    and more like this:
    [​IMG]

    "The Sea cannot claim us, Henrich."
     
  16. Facepalm

    Facepalm
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    ALT FOCUS:

    I'd buy this submarine:

    [​IMG]

    And cruise around a beach somewhere scaring the shit out of people.
     
  17. botox

    botox
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    It truly pains me to know that there are at least a few kids on this planet who own that submarine. Ravenous envy doesn't seem adequate to describe how it now feels when I reflect on my ocean-going days when my only "propulsion systems" were my own limbs powering my impressive 2" thick foam vessel. Ignorance is bliss.

    Two Person Hovercraft
    Now for something a little more realistic. Just go ahead and try to read that product description without getting aroused. If there is anyone in the state of North Carolina who shares my passion for this miracle and has $8,500 plus tax, shipping, etc to invest please PM me immediately. Perhaps we could have the 'Sack draw up some sort of joint ownership/timeshare contract??
     

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  18. Danger Boy

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    Dude, these are pretty common, they've been making them for 30 years or better. Find yourself a good used one for a couple thousand. My buddy and I have one that was given to us, all we had to do is fix it up and get it running.

    And yes, they are as fun as they look.