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Hackey-Suck

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Crown Royal, Apr 3, 2011.

  1. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    What is a "hack"?

    Well, to define it through example, it's this asshole:
    [​IMG]

    ...that's Greg Gillis, the "D.J." (using the term as loosely as humanly possible) known as Girl Talk, who's wildly popular amongst hipsters and others who wouldn't know good dance music if it took a dump on their face. He makes mash-up tunes, which is when you take other songs from artists that actually wrote and recorded music, steal it, then claim it as your own creation. This guy is a fucking insult to the DJ world. No turntables. No players. No headphones, no crossfades, no mixers. Just him in his undies playing on his laptop like every other hack DJ that uses a laptop (they lie and say it's for downloading music, but they play their sets on it) and the room goes nuts for him.

    To give you an equivlent of what this guy does that earns him lots of money and celebrity, it would be like going to a concert to see your favourite band. Then, a roadie comes out on stage with a boombox, pops in their greatest hits CD, and you all listen to it. No work, no effort, but "in the industry" regardless. Disgusting.

    Focus: Who are some of your (least) favourite hacks whether they be in pop culture or your personal life? Explain what makes them a hack in your eyes.
     
  2. DrFrylock

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    I keep coming back to this thread thinking it's going to turn into a stream of Nickelback references and people trying in vain to defend Radiohead. But something about it gives me a good feeling. So let's try it.
     
  3. Aetius

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    The United States House of Representatives.

    ...what, too broad?
     
  4. hoju

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    Is there any possible way that this thread can go without Mencia, Leary vs. Hicks, Creed, Limp Bizkit, and the aforementioned Nickleback and Radiohead?
     
  5. Volo

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    And this thread is over, folks.

    Lock this shit up. Ain't nothin' good comin' outta here.
     
  6. DrFrylock

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    Well, we'll see how it goes for a little while longer. But maybe we can add some interest, based on the photo above:

    Girl Talk up there is a skinny, hairy white dude wearing only boxer shorts in public. I understand that there is nothing illegal with a man being in public with his shirt off. However, I have great difficulty seeing any guy with their shirt off that is not at the beach or in a swimming situation. I wear clothing pretty much at all times, as part of my personal contribution to the Keep America Beautiful campaign.

    ALT FOCUS: Do you mind guys having their shirts off? In what situations is it acceptable? Or never acceptable? I am especially interested to hear from TiBettes on this matter.
     
  7. Gravitas

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    Nicholas motherfucking Sparks. You know who is. That guy that the pre-Twilight girl will list as her favorite author with an "omg love! love! LOVE HIM!" on their facebook profile. He was the guy behind A Walk To Remember, The Notebook, and the other various derivatives that have you thinking death by auto-erotic asphyixation might not be so bad, because you would never be forced to sit through his drivel again and you might get a good orgasm out of the deal.

    Sure, I'm a twenty-something male who just doesn't like bullshit love stories dripping with sentimentality where the characters just can't be together because of some immovable obstacle whether it is cancer, their parents, the army, or Miley Cyrus's buck ass teeth. That's fine. I will keep to myself, but this d-bag has to go and say something like this in an interview:


    There is also this gem:

    Being a hack is bad enough, but I will never tolerate a hack who passes off their hackery and potboilers as anything more than that.

    And while I'm here fuck Stephanie Meyer too.
     
  8. Jimmy James

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    ALT FOCUS: Do you mind guys having their shirts off? In what situations is it acceptable? Or never acceptable? I am especially interested to hear from TiBettes on this matter.

    Put me in the "never" category. The only time it's acceptable for a guy to not wear a shirt is if you're taking a shower. And even then, that's pushing it. No straight guy in the history of ever has actively wished for a shirtless dude to show up. If you do see a guy with a shirt off, it's usually some guy you know you're automatically going to hate anyway. I've got a complexion that borders on "clear" and weigh 250 pounds. You want to know who wants to see me with my shirt off? NOBODY. I guarantee you there's some asshole out there who looks like Conan O'Brien after a pie eating contest, and he's counting the days until he can visually pollute your day at the beach. If it were up to me, it would be legal to harpoon these people.
     
  9. p00g0blin

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    We're evolving.

    Step 1 - Take a shit (maybe in a toilet or a puddle of mud).
    Step 2 - Record the audio.
    Step 3 - Throw in a couple Scott Stapp "YASSEAAH" lyrics with some repetitive rave fart beats.
    Step 4 - Sell it.
    Step 5 - Make millions.

    There's gotta be an app for that..

    Oh wait, that's how a lot of it already is nowadays.

    Dec. 2012 is right around the corner.
     
  10. KIMaster

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    I think there are an awful lot of hacks out there, and many of them gain wide-spread recognition and fame. Some of them even produce worthwhile art every now and then.

    It's easy to list the obvious ones like Mencia, Leary, Meyer, etc., but I'll go a little deeper.

    Darren Aronofsky- "Black Swan" was a shitty remake/update of "Perfect Blue", which he bought the US rights to in order not to get sued. "Requiem for a Dream" was a "don't do drugs kids...mkay?" message wrapped up in laughable cliches and characters, and weak violence, only partially redeemed by the amazing Clint Mansell soundtrack. "The Wrestler" was very good, but also a predictable rip-off of the "Beyond the Mat" documentary.

    The guy is a second-rate director at best and has yet to come up with any interesting idea, or make something new.

    Quentin Tarantino (?)- He is a hack, but he actually admits this. I guess I can respect that. 3 good/excellent films and 5 shitty ones is okay, too. I used to despise him way more for doing shitty renditions of Asian action classics, and his pretentious, stupid-as-fuck dialogue.

    JK Rowling- Shitty, second-rate writer producing a stupid, unimaginative series.

    She is a level or two higher than someone like Stephanie Meyer, but make no mistake; it's still fucking shit.

    Jane Austen- I agree with Mark Twain here; "any library is a good library that does not have a Jane Austen book in it...even if it has no other books at all."
     
  11. Crown Royal

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    Timbaland-
    You hum a few fucking times into a microphone, flip a few fucking switches, DON'T write the lyrics and all of a sudden your name goes before the band actually recording the song, FUCKING SHAME ON YOU. Yeah, you've made a couple catchy beats. Anybody with ProTools can.
     
  12. BL1Y

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    Andrea Dworkin.
     
  13. iczorro

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    Anti-focus: DJ Earworm is a guy that only uses samples/mashes up other people's songs. But the way he does it is so complex and well done that it becomes an art form in itself. He does well enough that saying he's "stealing other people's music" is like saying he's "using other people's notes".




     
    #13 iczorro, Apr 7, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  14. toddus

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    Patrick Swayze. I wouldn't want to see him any other way.
     
  15. Devils Advocate

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    Okay, I have no problem being the shallow tibette in this thread.

    If you are/have: old, ugly, fat, hairy, glow-in-the-dark pale, man boobs, physical inperfections, or in attractive in any fucking way possible, I don't want to see you shirtless. However, if you are hot, I have no problem leering at you shirtless. I understand that while men are working outside, for example on a car, they tend to do it with their shirts off. I have no problem with that, if you are attractive. In fact, I find that incredibly sexy. It is down right sexy watching a hot guy do physical activity. I might even join you.

    However, if you resemble santa, a wildebeast, casper, a gorilla, or a fucking caveman, you will not find me near you. If I am near you I will either voice my opinion of you being shirtless, or I will give you all sorts of dirty looks. Put a fucking shirt on, or a tank top on. No one wants to see that shit.

    You can bitch at me being shallow all you fucking want, I don't care. The same thing goes for women. Do you want to see a 300 pound hippo, with saggy tits, walking around in a bikini? How about seeing a grandma in spandex? Same goes for saggy titted women that wear no bras. Put a fucking bra on, dress for your size, and your appearance. They should not make plus sized bikinis or thongs.

    Just my opinion of course.
     
  16. lust4life

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    Hacks: "Television news pundits" on both sides of the aisle.

    As for the shirtless guys in public, it's one thing if your at the beach/pool and your gut isn't spilling over the waistband of your Speedos (yeah, that's another image branded into my brain from a vacation). Also, a lot of the guys in my neighborhood mow their lawns shirtless. I don't care if you look like John Cena or Haystacks Calhoun. You're either showing-off or off-putting. Put on a t-shirt or at least, a wife-beater.
     
  17. Nom Chompsky

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    God, THIS.

    He's made barely anything of note. Seriously, once you take away One in a Million, If Your Girl Only Knew, Pony, Sock it to Me, The Rain, Big Pimpin', Hey Papi, One Minute Man, Get Ur Freak On, Hola Hovito, Ugly, Raise Up, Roll Out, Oops (Oh My), Cry Me a River, Deliverance, Dirt off Your Shoulder, Pass That Dutch, I'm so Fly, Promiscuous, Sexyback, Ayo Technology, Off That, and Thank Me Now, his production discography looks a whole lot worse, amirite?

    On another note, Perez Hilton is a hack.
     
  18. scotchcrotch

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    M Knight Shymalan got lucky with the Sixth Sense. I think everyone can agree with that as every movie he's made since then has been panned and looks like it was thrown together over the weekend.

    Schumaker ruined the Batman franchise.


    I've only seen clips, but Wendy Williams appears to be the least self-aware, biggest fucktard to ever grace daytime tv (and that's saying a lot)
     
  19. Dude

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    Girl Talk is iffy, but don't be so quick to bash mash-ups. Some of it can be really, really good. It's not original, but its great house-party music. Rather than Girl Talk, check out White Panda.





    As far as dudes in various states of dress goes, I've worked at pools for too long to give two shits how dressed someone is. You don't want to wear a shirt? Go ahead, I could care less. Obviously you need to respect places like stores and restaurants, but stuff like mowing the yard or just walking around in the summer? Shirt totally optional. Farmers' tans are no joking matter.

    Hacks? I would like to nominate Soulja Boy, but you still have to respect someone for having the ability to make so much money while lacking so much talent. That's almost a skill in itself.
     
    #19 Dude, Apr 7, 2011
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  20. rei

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    Unbreakable was fucking awesome, otherwise I'm right with you