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Getting the Left beat out of you.

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by kuhjäger, Oct 23, 2009.

?

So..

  1. I'm right handed

    219 vote(s)
    75.3%
  2. I'm left handed

    72 vote(s)
    24.7%
  1. kuhjäger

    kuhjäger
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    There is something sinister about left handed people.

    Getting a hand job from a lefty for the first time was an interesting experience. Everything seemed backwards somehow.

    It was like having a triple stranger (the double being sitting on your left hand)
     
  2. Mexicutioner

    Mexicutioner
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    I'm a lefty, as are my two older brothers. Nobody else in our known family [aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins] are lefties which is weird.

    I've had this debate before, left handed people are the most shit on group of people currently in the world.

    Examples:
    In school, anytime you play softball in PE, theres about 30 right handed gloves and 2 ratty left handed gloves that have been school property since Ty Cobb played.
    All the desks with the armrests, the armrests are on the right side.
    Spiral notebooks are a bitch to write in because they dig in your palm. Those non spiral notebooks are pieces of shit where the papers just fall out on their own and you lose your shit.
    5% of premature lefthanded people deaths are caused by using right handed items.
     
  3. effinshenanigans

    effinshenanigans
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    One of my best friends in college was born left-handed. His mother had read somewhere that left-handed people die younger, so she taught him to be right-handed (smacking spoons out of his left hand and such). He writes right-handed and throws right-handed, but he'll dribble a basketball prodominantly with his left hand. He's got a killer hook shot with the left hand, but I'm pretty sure his jump shot is done right-handed.
     
  4. Beefy Phil

    Beefy Phil
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    Beyond smudging the ink from a pen under your hand when you write, the only other disadvantage is having to deal with "Oh, you're left-handed?" any time someone notices.

    No, I'm not left-handed. You've fallen for my trickery. What you're seeing is a mirror image of me being projected from an alternate universe. I'm a scientist, you see, sent here to study people who ask stupid fucking questions.

    I am sort of weird, though. I write and eat left-handed, but shoot, throw, kick and hit right-handed. If I try to do any of those things lefty, I look like someone played a bongo rhythm on my soft spot during infancy.

    My penis, however, is an equal opportunity employer.
     
  5. Dmix3

    Dmix3
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    I'm the only left-handed person in my entire family. Extended family as well, going back at least three generations. You think it's bad for all you guys try being a lefty in the South, the region of the country that doesn't care for things to be different. Every single teacher I've ever had has tried to correct it, luckily most of us lefties are stubborn as hell so I ignored them. I differ from most lefties in that I wear my watch on my left wrist and i jerk off with my right hand, go figure.
     
  6. xrayvision

    xrayvision
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    I feel somewhat disadvantaged being a lefty. Its not so much ink smudging as it was pencil lead smudging. All throughout elementary school, the medial side of my left hand would be shiny graphite colored and the paper would become an unintelligible mess.

    When I wanted to learn guitar, my dad bought a really cheap one when I was a kid and restrung it lefty. It sounded like shit but I tried to learn anyway. I stopped playing for about a year because I just couldn't figure it out. I decided one day to pick up his guitar and try it. I found it much easier, so I continued to play righty. At this point, I am lefty but I play guitar righty.

    I also masturbate righty.
    I bat lefty.
    I golf lefty.
    I too wear my watch on the left.

    The one thing I always found to be really cool, and this is not meant to sound political at all is that a lot of the past presidents were lefties too. I'm not sure about Obama. I always thought that was a neat statistic. A lot of left-handed people I know are also super intelligent.

    In general, I don't mind being lefty. It sometimes makes for an interesting conversation. Sometimes.

    From what I was told, my grandmother was born a lefty, but as a child, they also beat it out of her in school.
     
  7. zyang31

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    Did anyone else think this was going to be a thread about conservatives beating up liberals?

    I have some questions for lefties: for those who drive a stick shift, did you think learning how to drive was much more difficult from normal people?

    This might apply only to university or high school lefties here, but when you're using a computer at a library, does it aggravate you that the mouse is always on the right side?
     
  8. Dmix3

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    Why, lefties get the advantage of driving with our dominate hand, why would that be more difficult?

    No, I prefer using the mouse with my right hand, I also preferred it that way when gaming as well, so I could move/react with my dominate hand.
     
  9. Noland

    Noland
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    That's impressive parenting, right there. Anybody gonna be surprised if that guy goes over to his parent's house one night with a machete held in his left hand?

    I'm right handed. My older brother is a lefty, the only one in the family I know of.

    All three of our children are right handed. Although, with zero prompting from me, the oldest one will switch hit every once in a while. I'm thinking about trying to set up Nike endorsements already.
     
  10. Beefy Phil

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    Only when your second-grade teacher gives you a 'C' for Handwriting on an otherwise perfect report card, and then makes you skip recess to practice writing cursive, while the rest of the class goes outside and peg each other in the face with tennis balls like normal children should.

    No grudge here. No sir.
     
  11. guavo

    guavo
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    When I was little, my parents tried to force me to be right handed, but I was stubborn. I don't believe in the left handed people are more creative crap. I'm a left handed programmer with an engineering degree. My sister is right handed and she is an art teacher.

    There are disadvantages:
    - Many gun grips are contoured for right handed people.
    - Many scissors are contoured.
    - Obviously spiral notebooks. I hate spiral notebooks.
    - Smudged writing and ink/graphite on your hand/arm if you drag your hand while writing.
    - Those goddamn point of sale credit card things where they make the pen wire too short for lefties.

    There are advantages too:
    - Sports. Right handed people generally don't know how to deal with lefties in most sports.
    - For lefty smokers (formerly) the left hand is by the window when driving, so no need to get ash all over your car.
    - Some women have a thing for lefties. I guess our predisposition to injury and early death makes them wet?
    - Easy to teach right-handed people dance/sport movements or learn from them because you mirror them.

    I am slowly forcing myself to become more ambidextrous. (Which I would do if I were right-handed too). I can do most things right handed as long as they don't involve fine motor skills. Driving a stick shift is easy. I still write like an epileptic first grader on a pixie stick bender with my right hand, but it's becoming better. I can't use any knives or scissors with my right hand (I even cut steak with my left) and I throw like a girl right handed. I feel equally comfortable in southpaw/regular fighting stances. The only thing where my right hand dominates my left is the computer mouse. However, I use my left thumb on laptop touch pads.

    I would say that I am more disadvantaged by my height (6'3) than my handedness though.
     
  12. Luke 217

    Luke 217
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    I'm a righty, and for some reason one of the only things that I do lefty is drive. Driving lefty if you're a righty just seems better because your dominant hand is free to do anything you want it to do. Play with your MP3 player, radio, garmin, fiancee's cooter, my donger. (and by donger I mean my cock and balls, not a personal Asian dude)
    Of course this doesn't work if you have to have your dominant hand for more important things, like say, driving.

    The only downside to driving lefty is smoking because the cigarette has to be in my right hand, which makes it difficult to ash out off the drivers window. And this is why I never buy a car without a sunroof/moonroof.
     
  13. Muney

    Muney
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    No idea why, but im a righty with everything, but when I make sweet, sweet love to myself, its with the left hand. Using my right just feels weird and awkward for some reason. I have never been able to figure it out.

    This could be filed under "too much information"
     
  14. mad5427

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    I'm left handed. My mom was left haned when she was little but her parents beat it out of her. She claimed she would never ever do that to her kids. It was a difficult transition for her and she wanted my sister and I to be whatever handed we chose.

    My hand writing is shit because I have a retarded curve up and around so I can see what I'm writing. Smearing pencil always was a problem.

    String instruments were a bitch. And more expensive. It was harder to learn since you have to really learn to read chord charts, etc. differently. They now have lefty charts, but not 15 years ago. And, I was always limited in instruments. I also couldn't play my friends or at most places where they had a guitar lying around. Frustrating.

    I've always been creative and have done well in the arts. Music, art, architecture, etc. Could have a bit to do with the side of my brain that I guess I use, maybe that is linked to my left-handedness. I don't know much about that and never really cared.

    Golfing and cutting with scissors are still the only thing I do right handed. To this day, I've used one pair of lefty scissors and it was strange. I had to learn to use what was there. Golfing, I grew up swinging a bat lefty and when I first tried swinging a club, I was bringing it back like a bat. I took a righty club and the motion was much more fluid. I still putt lefty, just because of putt-putt growing up. I learned lefty and can't switch that. So my set is all righty except the putter.

    I've come across a few vegetable peelers that are righty only. I've always had to seek out the ones that are the same each way. May sound like a little thing, but all you rightys, take your peeler if it works both ways out and use your left hand. Slow and sloppy.

    These are all really minor things though and life really isn't much different. If I'm going to hell for being a lefty, so be it.

    Leonardo Da Vinci and Jimi Hendrix were leftys, so that's pretty cool.
     
  15. pterodactyl

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    My entire family, dad, mom sister and me are all left handed.

    Extended family dinners suck because everyone else in our family is right handed so we get put at one end of the table...also my dad always makes the lame joke "left handed people are the only ones in their right minds" every time we all get together. Typical "dad" humor.

    Of course like my dad, every time I meet a girl in a bar who is left handed I always drop the "wanna make left handed babies" line. 70% of the time it works all the time.

    Other than eating next to someone who is right handed, I never really notice it.
     
  16. MoreCowbell

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    My uncle was left-handed. Then the nuns got to him.

    Now he can't write for shit with either hand.


    A childhood friend of mine is weird as shit. He isn't righty or lefty. Not ambidextrous. He just can't make up our mind. While I might mess one or two of these up, the concept will be clear:

    Write lefty
    Shoots a basketball righty
    Bats lefty
    Throws a baseball righty
    Golfs lefty
    Puts righty
    Throws a football righty

    The weirdest one? While a coach got him to stop w/ this bullshit, for a long time, he would play tennis right handed but serve lefthanded.

    Oh, and he is black and played tennis. That was weird too.
     
  17. Luke 217

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    I think you are currently what evolution has brought us to, because as all rightys know, its hard to move the mouse with your hand when your dick is in it. We've all done it, accidentally stumbled into some weird site where there were trannies blowing some dude in a Nazi uniform...... And we have to take our dick out of our hands because if we don't click out of it fast, we're gonna lose our boners. This is where smacking it with your left hand, leaving the right to operate the mouse is tantamount. You sir are a better man than me. When it comes to jerking off. I salute you.
     
  18. dixiebandit69

    dixiebandit69
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    I'm right handed, but I have an obsession with symmetry, so I go out of my way to do a lot of things with my left hand to keep my body "balanced," if you can understand what I mean.
    Ex: Carrying things like suitcases and grocery baskets, opening doors, etc.
     
  19. ghettoastronaut

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    By this standard, Brits driving a stick would have a hell of a time learning compared to North Americans, and yet, the vast majority of cars over there are manual.

    I'm a righty, but I hit left in baseball, swing left in golf, but otherwise use my right hand in all other sports (racquet sports, target shooting, whatever). When I was younger I'd have to shoot backwards when playing with someone else's clubs, and rentals are always shit. The family golf tournament does have a special category for "best lefty", though. That's always worth going for.
     
  20. pterodactyl

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    I learned to drive using an automatic, but I drive a stick now and it really doesn't feel awkward or anything, it's not like our right hands are deformed baby arms or something.

    It doesn't really piss me off about the mouse thing, you got used to it quickly, at the same time whenever I got done using a public computer I left the mouse on the left side so the next person if they were right handed had to deal with the same thing I normally did.