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Getting canned

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by villagebicycle, Oct 12, 2010.

  1. villagebicycle

    villagebicycle
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    Experienced Idiot

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    So I lost my job today. One of three, but the most lucrative and professional of them all. Luckily, I can pick up more hours at the other two and pay the rent and bills, but sadly they don't contribute to my professional growth much.

    I guess I can't say I was fired, since it was a temporary position that potentially could have lead into a salaried spot, but I certainly could have busted my ass more to keep it. It also taught me two things: lie to HR about certain shit and cold calling sucks dick.

    The reason why I say lie to hr is because had I not been honest and said that I am not motivated in sales and do the bare minimum, I would have gotten a job in marketing. I should have just said "sales isn't for me, but I excel in the marketing aspect of it, so put me in marketing full time". That's what really fucked me on this one, since I was very enthusiastic when speaking to the marketing people.

    I realized the error of my ways, though, and left on a good note. No punching/screaming/stealing shit. Except I took a vitamin water.

    FOCUS: When have you been canned? Did you do any crazy shit? What did you learn from the experience?
     
  2. DrFrylock

    DrFrylock
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    I have never been canned from a job, and I try to avoid getting disciplined, although it happened a few times at my first job. At this job, which was retail, we had part-timers (mostly high school and college kids) like me who were on a ridiculously low hourly wage (like $1 above the minimum wage at the time) and a few full-timers, who were on commission.

    This created the most bizarre circumstances, because they tracked everybody's sales and the part-timers were expected to put up good numbers in terms of dollars and items-per-sale (upselling for the win!) even though they were not commissioned. We were also encouraged to ring up some of our sales under the commissioned folks' numbers, so they would get credit. So you got the stink-eye if you weren't putting up good enough numbers on your own and the stink-eye if you weren't tossing enough sales to the commissioned guys. I got in trouble about 2-3 times for trying to "poach sales" from the commissioned guys because I heard them explaining something very obviously wrong and would say "hey, um, did you maybe consider X..." I had no incentive to "poach" anything because I didn't get paid squat for more sales, and all it really would have helped me do is exchange one form of stink-eye for another.

    I quit when I found out that the brand new guy was making $0.25 an hour more than I was.

    Ultimately the whole company went out of business and I have a much better job, so who's laughing now, bitches?
     
  3. JWags

    JWags
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    I've been "fired" once, and laid off twice. I have always equated or defined "lay off" as factors outside your control, normally having to do with a company's financial position. Whereas "fired" comes down to your personal performance.

    My first position out of college was with a logistics company. Well this company was growing like wildfire when I started, but once I got there, their rapid growth and expansion began to catch up with them, aka not everyone had the resources to set the world on fire, and success for the newer classes came slower (in addition to the recession which severely cut back transportation spends, whether they cared to admit it or not). However, the monthly classes of new hires didn't slow and thus they began laying off older classes. I was in the middle of my best month by far, and with a couple promising new accounts just before New Years when I was called in to be informed I was being let go. I ran into a few kids in my starting class in the lobby in similar boats and found that only the top 2-3 kids out of 20-25 remaining were kept.

    The other layoff was when I was trading equities. I loved my job, and after a rocky start, I really began to get a feel for it and ripped off 2 consecutive months that were tops of any new trader over the last 18 months. However, that company was run by shady and incompetent asshats and they ran into trouble both with regulatory agencies as well as their own finances. After 2 rough days, I was called in to be informed that I was being let go cause I was losing the firm too much money. In reality, that was complete BS as I was still up over 20% Month to Date and was further confirmed recently as I talked to an old coworker of mine still there and he told me there are 10 traders left at the firm, where there were around 120 at the time I left.

    My "fired" experience was actually last week. I had been working for a diamond wholesaler for about 18 months. Now I didn't love the work, and the pay was horrendous, but it paid the bills for the time being as I work on my MBA part-time and there was the potential for me to grow as the company attempted to aggressively expand, or so I thought. About 3 weeks ago, I approached my boss and asked for a fairly substantial raise given my low starting salary, the progression and growth of my position, and my solid performance. I was ready to be low balled and negotiate, but I was not prepared for them telling me they could do absolutely nothing for me. Considering my salary was paltry to begin with, I mentally decided it was time to move on and started floating my resume some nights. That got expedited as last week I was called in, basically as I was leaving work for the night and told I was being let go because my performance was not optimal and it just "wasnt working out". Funny how just a week or 2 prior to me asking for a raise, a friend of mine at another partner firm of ours was told by my higher ups what a stellar job I was doing and how I was critical to the growth of the company moving forward. Oh well, good luck finding another bright college graduate to do your dead end, underpaid bitch work you cheap fucks. Sure I wanted to leave, but the worst thing about getting fired from a place you hate is not getting to do it on your own terms.
     
  4. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Ive never had a grown up office job yet, hearing the stories I don't think I have the wherewithal to handle it unless it is truly something I love doing. Even in my shitty part time jobs I have a pattern that usually ends up with being fired. Start, work hard to learn the ins and outs, pick up shifts to seem enthused, get comfortable, start slacking when ever the chance arises, refuse to be involved with workplace politics, get fired for lousy output and not kissing the right asses.

    The last barbacking job I had ended when the day manager was switched to bar manager at night. Two servers he liked were switched to barbacking. They got away with the same shit I'd be chewed out for in addition to multiple smoke breaks a night. Id get yelled at for taking a breather in the back while at the same time they'd be out puffing away. That shit always irked me. Anyway, after a few months they got another of their server friends switched to barbacking. I didn't think anything of it when I came in for my shift, seeing someone being trained, but the manager called me to the back immediately. It was one of those situations where they had made up their mind the week before but never bothered to tell me or take me off the new schedule that was posted. I started to get heated about this and I could tell my manager wouldn't be able to handle a freak out but I didn't feel like it was worth it. In a George Costanza JerkStore moment on the way home I thought of a great "fuck this job" scene that was already passed. The day I was fired the club section of our bar was having a ice luge party and it was already set up when the manager was giving me my walking papers. A proper freak out and round house kicking of the ice luge would have been epic. Alas, I was a puss and probably wouldnt have done it if I had thought of it in time...
     
  5. Disgustipated

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    I actually got sort of fired on Friday.

    The Chairman of the industry board I was on called me and asked me to resign my directorship. The reason he did this was because the government rang him and told him to get rid of me, otherwise their "credibility would suffer". It would seem I've managed to get under the bureaucrats' skins to a slight degree and keep asking questions and pointing out holes that they'd rather not have to deal with. Somehow they think this would negatively affect me.

    It's bad timing for the group, as the only other lawyer on the board had to leave this month due to outside work commitments.

    I happily resigned. It was a voluntary (read: non paid) position, and I put much more in than I got out of it. I offered to come along as an observer, which they're going to consider. That way I'm off the books (my vote only counted for 1/12 at board level anyway).

    The really stupid thing is that now I'm not hampered in how much I want to be a pain in the ass. Up to now, I've always held back in mind for my board position. Now, I don't have that fetter. The opposition already hates me anyway, so now I can stop pulling the punches. And I have a lot more free time in my day to do so.
     
  6. Lasersailor

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    In my last job I got laid off due to lack of work. I saw that one coming from a hundred miles away. For a month my boss scrambled to try and find me any work. I left amicably because my boss really did do a lot for me and tried so hard to keep me on. If the economy ever does return I'd like to go back there.


    The other job was working Buffet / Room Service at my college's conference center hotel. It was a shit job, but I worked very hard at it. It was spectacularly fun as a change of pace from construction. Learning the ins and outs of a nice restaurant as well as a little bit of cooking which wasn't like the movie Waiting was a blast. I was working harder than everyone around me, and was getting compliments from the chefs, from the managers, and from the waiters.

    Then I got called in and was fired. It was so unexpected that I would not have been more surprised if a man in a giant pink bunny costume jumped out and kicked me in the balls. I wish I had done something cool like unroll every silverware roll onto the floor, mashed a lot of buttons on the clock in machine, or scoop out all the sternos and make a bon fire in the parking lot. But I just sat there saying, "What? WHY!?!" They wouldn't tell me why they fired me.
     
  7. Durbanite

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    I've never been canned because I've never been hired in the first place. Booya.
     
  8. Frank

    Frank
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    I've never been canned, but I'm also not the kind of fucking moron that tells HR I'm not motivated.

    My favorite example was at my last job. A girl knew her boss was going to ask her to do something hard and time consuming so she put headphones on and pretended she didn't know he was there in hopes that he would delegate to someone else. Headphones were banned in my department after that. Fucking bitch.
     
  9. Sherwood

    Sherwood
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    End of December '08: "The company is doing really well, we had a good year in spite of the tough economy, I'm really happy about where we are as a company.

    Friday Jan 9, 2009: 10% of workforce laid off. "Wow, that was close but I'm still here"
    Monday Jan 12, 2009: YOU'RE FIRED as the layoffs reach 20% of the company.

    It should be noted that when there are only 10 people working there, 2 people constitute 20% of the company. Poorly run media fart that was operated by an asshole who I'd like to punch in the scrotum if I ever saw him again.
     
  10. rei

    rei
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    When I was 18 I had a pretty good deal, systems operator for a server farm, I'd basically sit around smoking pot with my boss / colleagues waiting for something to break, or installing Linux or FreeBSD. That said we were a pretty secure datacentre so I had to log our security checks at the beginning and end of the shift

    Before I continue this is important - I'm fairly technically skilled, but I have motor skill issues I've been to therapy for, but still some things, especially with really small screws etc, can take me longer. So I'd be very frustrating to work with when mounting a server to a rack (i'd cut myself with a screwdriver several times trying to get the bolt bracket in) but I was the best coder + unix guy on non-management.
    Its important to note the owner of the company really liked me, while our systems administrator did not. I showed up an hour early one night (I worked 8 pm to 4 am) and did my security check right then. The systems administrator, when leaving after I'd done so, opened one of the cabinets as a "test" to make sure I did the logs accurately. When 4 AM rolled around, I knew no one else had been in the data centre so the lock logs should be the same. That got me called in and canned for security fail, as I was a bit too trusting. I was rehired 90 days later because, as said the owner liked me and wanted me back ASAP. I actually ended up working there until I was almost 22, and they gave me a great reference to my current job. Unfortuantly they have since gone under.
     
  11. D26

    D26
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    I was fired from McDonalds. I still consider it the best thing that has ever happened to me.

    At the time, I was 20 years old and working at McDonalds. I started there when I was 15, was made a shift manager by the time I was 18 (I started Manager Classes when I was 17, but finished after my birthday), and during the two years I was a shift manager, one of the assistant store managers was expecting to take over the store from the very, very shitty store manager. She told me that when she took over the store, she wanted to make me the 2nd assistant. This would be a salaried position, and I'd be making pretty good money for a 20 year old. I was also attending a commuter college and still living at home with my parents.

    Well, this assistant wasn't made the store manager, and she quit as a result. They brought in a store manager from another store. His entire goal in taking over our store was to fire as many of the shift managers as possible. He didn't like us or the way we ran things, which was different (not necessarily worse, just different) than he did. So, instead of having us change, he figured it'd be easier to try to fire as many managers as he could. He was looking for any excuse to fire us, and ended up firing 4 of the shift managers who were there when he took over (and there were only 8 total).

    We were having a big store inspection coming. I, along with a service employee and another shift manager, volunteer to stay at the store overnight to clean. The store manager says he'll stay all night with us and help us out. Awesome. Except he doesn't stay all night. He brings in a guy to power-wash the floors in the dining room. The guy power-washes, leaving a big, wet mess in the dining room that we have to mop up. Power-washing ends at 2 am, giving us 4 hours to mop up before we open. There are 4 of us here (two shift managers, store manager, one service worker). Plenty of time. Except the store manager sends the other shift manager to clean the fryers, sends the service worker home, then leaves himself, leaving myself and the other shift manager to finish mopping, as well as cleaning the fryers and other bullshit jobs we can't possibly finish in 4 hours.

    Morning rolls around, we get as much done as we can, and we leave around 6:30 AM. Note that by 6:30 AM, I had been working for 16 hours straight, and hadn't slept in well over 24 hours. When I get in the next day, he reams me for 'leaving the store a mess.' I calmly explain (see: yell at him) that if he hadn't sent home our help and then left himself, we could have gotten everything finished. He tells me I am "on thin ice."

    The next day is a Sunday. Sundays at our McDonalds were busy for a grand total of about 4 hours. Between 8 and 10 AM and between 11 and 1 PM. My store manager calls me and tells me to send two service workers to clean out the store room before our inspection (which is now in two days). I tell him I am happy to do that after our lunch rush. He tells me he is coming in at noon, and if there aren't 2 service employees downstairs cleaning, I will be fired for ignoring his directions. I acquiesce to his orders (I still wanted the job) but I was fucking fuming. The rush hits, I'm busy as fuck, customers are complaining, lines are out the door, and finally I snap after I tell my little brother (a regular employee) to make something and he tells me to go fuck myself. I fucking lose it, punch the nearest thing as hard as I can (A big plastic bin for holding still-frozen french fries) and scream 'MOTHER FUCKER' and walk to the back.

    Apparently, I scared a young girl in the lobby. Her mom ended up calling McDonalds headquarters and I was fired the next day.

    Of course, he didn't come in that day. He was bullshitting me, and I should've known he wouldn't come in on a Sunday.

    In retrospect, there was, is, and never will be a reason to get that pissed about a McDonalds job. However, if I hadn't gotten fired, I wouldn't have gotten motivated to move out of my parents house and go away to school (I transferred to Purdue in West Lafayette to finish my degree), wouldn't have stayed with my girlfriend (now my wife), wouldn't have gotten my job after college in Lafayette, and wouldn't be back in school studying to be a teacher today. The whole experience taught me to be more mellow and calm down, and not let silly little shit get under my skin. Most importantly, getting fired lit a fire under my ass to make myself a better person. I've maintained for the past few years that if I ever saw him again, I'd shake his hand and thank him for firing me. Too bad I have no idea where he is now.
     
  12. Lowest

    Lowest
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    The following story did not happen to me, it happened to a co-worker of my wife. Still, it taught me a very, very important lesson.
    *******************************************

    Attorney A had been practicing tort litigation for five years in a small law firm and wanted to start a family, as she had been recently married and wasn't getting any younger. The name partner, Attorney B, was also a woman, and she made a big deal about the "challenges" of being a female attorney, had this whole shtick about wanting to be a "mentor" for other female attorneys and "nurturing" them in the practice.

    Attorney A, at a lunch with Attorney B, mentioned that while she was very happy at her current position, she did not see herself as a firm attorney forever, since she wanted to have children. Attorney A said she wanted to look into transitioning into an in-house position in the distant future, possibly with the help and input of Attorney B.

    Attorney A was fired the next day. Her statement to her boss was taken as a sign that she was not "committed" and the firm was not going to pay her salary while she was looking for a new job.
    **************************************************
    Yeah, my wife's old firm sucked, but I could see this happening at any firm. Moral of the story, don't EVER mention looking for another job, ever, until you have secured alternate employment. The other morale of the story-- all that shit about any law firm being "family friendly" or "flexible" -- it's horse crap.
     
  13. toddamus

    toddamus
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    I have been fired twice and quit twice. The most recent one was a month ago. I was working a a company who if you search google the company the 4th most searched result is "formereployer scam". So I was working for some shady fucks. Little did I know how shady. For starts the company was comprised entirely just graduated college students or current college students. This was to keep the pay low. They also stole sales leads from legitimate databases and resold them, in addition to spamming the fuck out of anyone and everyone. I interned at this company for a month and then was hired on for a month before I left/was fired.

    My entire job comprised solely of copying and pasting info into excel. For 8 hours a day, non stop all I did was hit control C from the internet page I was copying stuff from, then control V and pasting it. So the work sucked, and the pay was abysmal. I was getting paid 350/week. My boss also expected me to work unpaid overtime and greatly resented the fact that at 5:30pm everyday I would go home instead of staying there longer. After a while my boss and I no longer got a long. I resented the fact that my marketing manager was a 22 year old asian kid who thought he owned the world, he thought I was a lazy brat.

    It came to a critical point where I knew I had made my bed and it was time to go. At the end of a Friday I go to my boss and tell him this was my two weeks notice, that as of such and such date I would no longer be working. Well funny enough, he asked me if I could just not come back. The little fuck was going to fire me later that day anyway, I just beat him to the punch.

    Because of this experience I am much more gun shy of any future positions I may get. It was such a bad experience and the company exploited the workers to such a high degree I am highly cautious of any future work.
     
  14. MrPrime

    MrPrime
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    Lets see, total of 5 jobs in 2 years.

    First job was out of college, bullshit drafting job and for shitty pay. After busting my ass there for 8 months, I asked my boss for a raise as I was doing work that was not longer considered just drafting, but more production/purchasing/QA/QC....in line with what I went to school for.

    They came back with no raise, and we are actively looking for your replacement. The ops manager that told me this then went on to say that he would be keeping me on day to day notice and would let me know when I was not to come back in. The best part was that he would expect me to train my replacement (seriously?) This ended up with a quick email to the head engineer of our department (in Houston, I was in Edmonton, Alberta) that lead to the manager getting a stern talking to, and me with my job securely in place. Left the company after working there for a year because the ops manager made my life hell.

    Second job, worked there doing BS paper work for decent pay for 8 months. 3 weeks before I get laid off, the current Engineering manager puts his 2 week notice in (nice guy, really chill) and they hire this new engineering manager who is a total hotshot and completely full of himself. He gets trained in the following week, and on the last week I was there, he resigns with the quote "this place is a liability to my engineering degree, and there are somethings happening this week that I do not agree with." At this point he looks at me and says "you guys need to watch your backs". This was on a Tuesday (just over 2 weeks working with him). Thursday I get the 4:25 meeting with the boss. Says sales are slow, we have to lay you off. I respond with "Is this about the $50 000 fuckup you tried to pin on me?" He responds with "No" (read "yes"). Best part was when he asked if I had any last questions or comments, and my only answer to him was "this is the worst birthday present ever" (or best, cause I hated the place).

    3rd Job, worked for a interesting Automation company, had a ton of fun with it, but working with just the boss (2 man company) gets very stressful. Was laid off after 8 months when there was no work coming in. He kept me for as long as possible but let me know in advance when I was getting shit canned.

    The company I worked for after that let me go just shy of the 3 month probation because they were paying me to much and I did not seem interested in doing grunt drafting and paper work (cant blame them for thinking that).

    At this point, I enrolled in University to get my Mech Eng degree and make some real money doing this. Worked for the automation company again for 3 months before I left to get some extra cash.

    Fuck work damn it!
     
  15. Gravitas

    Gravitas
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    I have been fired only once. The only reason it is of note is because of who fired me.

    I was fired by my own mother.

    She was the superintendent of a super small school and needed someone to do some general maintenance work one summer. I just had to show up and move shit around basically. Books, desks, chairs, normal school stuff. The third morning I was there I had just got done moving quite a few chair/desk combos and I sat down to take what I intended to be a 5 minute break. I dozed off completely unintentionally.

    So I'm passed out sitting on the steps into the basement when my mom walks in and I get woken up with "Gravitas, wake up. You're fired." Apparently she stood there for like 10 minutes watching me sleep. I wasn't hungover and I had a full 7 hours the night before. I can't explain it to this day.

    Needless to say having everyone you know find out your mom fired you is fucking embarrassing. It's like getting beaten up by your little sister.
     
  16. Binary

    Binary
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    I did tech support for a small ISP right out of high school.

    My boss was a drunk. He would show up around 10am each morning, frequently with a 12-pack in his hand. By 3:00, he was running out to the store again for more. He ostensibly spent his time working on our ticketing system, which he was immensely proud of and which consisted of a half dozen visual basic forms that dumped their contents into a database, that any computer science student with a triple digit IQ could have whipped up as a weekend homework assignment.

    When the front desk girl quit I helped enter in dropped-off checks. After the second day, the boss and his wife spoke to me about my accuracy. I was a little confused since I have never had accuracy complaints about my typing, but I was extra diligent from then on, actually entering the stack an extra time in a spreadsheet (once forward, once backward) to check myself. Two days later, I get handed formal letter of warning, about the accuracy of my check entering, claiming almost 30% of my work was wrong, and the side comment that the 16 year old receptionist "could handle doing it right." As frustrated as I was by this (come on, entering the checks forwards and backwards results in the exact same error so that the totals matched?), I moved on.

    The next week, I closed up. We shut down at 8:00pm. It had been a super quiet night, so I was aimlessly screwing around on the internet, and looked up at one point and noticed the wall clock said a few minutes past 8, as did my computer clock. Sweet. Packed up and left, took about 5 minutes or so to shut everything off. Next day, I get handed another formal warning letter saying he drove there at 7:50 and the place was dark. I got mad but being one of my first real jobs, I objected but eventually tried to move past it.

    Three days later, I got lectured about signing on a client who wanted a $10k website that I was prepared to do fully within 3 weeks - which was one of the primary things I was hired to do. Lectured because the guy wanted artwork done which we didn't have the facilities for, and I didn't lie to him and consult the package of 200,000 clipart images that was provided to me. Note the guy was still going to spend the money with us, this was all over one image.

    Got fired the next day. His way of firing me was locking me out of my computer and having my coworker walk me 3 feet to the door. I didn't realize at the time that the guy simply had it in for me. Can't believe how blind I was to that.
     
  17. ROC711

    ROC711
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    "I'm not gonna do what everyone thinks I'm gonna do and... FLIP OUT man... all I wanna know is one thing... who's coming with me?"
     
  18. BL1Y

    BL1Y
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    February: "Record profits! 13.5% surge in revenue! Our diversification has made this recession highly profitable for us!"

    June: "Looks like we've avoided the more drastic measures other firms have had to take!"

    August: "BL1Y, pack your fucking bags. Looks like you'll never be a BL2Y! Hahaha!"

    I got laid off from my law firm last August (we were allowed to keep our jobs through October though). By "laid off" I actually mean I was probably "stealth fired." Traditionally, law firms don't fire people, especially not junior associates. But, with the recession and lots of other firms getting rid of people, a firm could cut their fat without drawing any attention. Some of the other people laid off seemed like decent employees though, so who knows, but I was definitely on the weaker side of the chain. I just flat out suck at securities regulations. They're really goddamn complex, and I'd rather be playing flash games online.

    Because I was slow getting admitted to the NY bar (though I'd passed the exam on the first try) I actually ended up getting sworn in after being given notice of my lay of. As such, I have never practiced law as a licensed attorney.

    I can't say I really did anything crazy. I stopped wearing ties (we were business formal), and only came to the office about two hours a day (I made sure I was there at some point in case they wanted to dock my accrued vacation pay). My office mate was also laid off and continued working full days out of fear that he would get "re-fired," ie: not get to finish out our remaining two months. I figured law firm management is too damn slow and stupid that it wouldn't be worth their trouble to re-fire anyone, and in any event, it would take them too long to discover I didn't do anything any more and process my second termination.

    The firm was so disorganized that some really senior partners didn't hear about the layoffs because they were in different departments. Several of us had been working for a different department and about a month after getting word of our impending demise, we were told that 40 hours a week wasn't cutting it, we needed to put in 60 hours or more. What the fuck? At a lunch (I wasn't going to pass up free food or CLE credits) the head of our trusts and estates group asked me if I was keeping busy. I don't think he understood when I laughed and said no, not really.

    I did steal about $500 in books though. The firm had a little supply room with copies of laws that get republished every year or two, like the NY commercial code, or the federal tax regs, and I just took one copy of everything over a period of several days.

    As for things I learned from the experience, the most important thing I guess is that I really suck at jobs I'm not interested in. I just can't muster the ability to cheerfully put in 18 hour days research bullshit that I don't care about and probably won't make any difference anyways.
     
  19. Binary

    Binary
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    383
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    Oct 21, 2009
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    This post had me curious about the fate of company since I noticed their website is down.

    Google has been kind enough to inform me that there is a six digit lien on the property from the IRS for unpaid employment taxes, my ex-boss was brought up on drug charges several months ago and plead guilty, and there is a line of customers waiting to file claims against the business for badly repaired computers or unexplained loss of internet service.

    The building is uninhabited and everything of value has been removed. They are unable to locate my ex-boss.
     
  20. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    I've only been canned from one job, when I was 19. I'd been working in pulp and paper mills as a power and recovery trainer, and was asked to do some technical writing for a computerized training system. I had no idea how to write what they wanted, and was completely lost. I asked multiple times for help or samples to get an example of what they wanted, and was ignored.

    At that point I gave up and played solitaire all day. For six weeks. They finally found time for a review and were shocked to find I had nothing. I was making $2k a week (1980's dollar to boot) for doing nothing.

    They called me in, gave me 2 weeks severance, and flew me home. Easiest cash I ever made, and don't feel badly about it at all. They sucked as managers.