I know that this post was probably originally written in jest, but it got me thinking- sometimes its good to just take a step back from everything that's going on in the world, take a deep breath, and really take a good hard look at the GOOD things in your life. This is the perfect time of year to reflect on the things you are truly thankful for, to really embrace the things that make you feel good, and maybe even go above and beyond the status quo by doing things to help spread the good feeling to others who may, for whatever reason, have a more difficult time of finding their own happy thoughts. For me its pretty easy this year- I'm not almost-dead this time (sweet!), and I have a beautiful, amazing wife and son to share my life with. The awesomeness of The Wife was driven even further home recently with a story I'd like to share: Back story first- About a year or so ago, we had a family of illegal immigrant Mexicans (queue all of the Mexican and The Wife jokes NOW!) move in across the street from us. I live right outside of the downtown area, so even though my house is newer and a little nicer (not bragging by any means- its small as hell- it just is what it is), there are a lot of older, more rundown pieces-of-shit that local landlords rent out to the lowest bidders. This house that the Mexicans rented was one of these. There's the dad, the mom, a boy around 10, and twin 6 year old boys. So we all go though our lives everyday, seeing each other outside but not interacting (I mean, how often do you interact with your neighbors that even KNOW, much less the ones that are strangers who don't speak English), until one day, as The Wife and I were pulling into our driveway and going inside of our house, we notice that the Mexicans are cooking on their front porch. The Wife, being Mexican and pregnant at the time, immediately swooned at the awesome smells of good homemade Mexican food, and so she waved and yelled in Spanish that everything smelled amazing. They waved back and we went into the house, not thinking anything else of it. 20 minutes later, there is a knock on the door- it is the Mexican's wife and one of their kids, both holding plates of food for us. It wasn't much at all (in fact, it was a couple pieces of carne asada, a few homemade tortillas, and sliced hot dogs), but the fact that they were willing to share what little they had was awesome to me. We thanked them profusely, and from then on The Wife would always make a point to say hi when we passed. Later, when we needed some work done on The Wife's house that she owns where her little sister lives (another long story), we hired the dad to work for us. He did an awesome job and refused payment until he was finished so that we could make sure that everything was done to our liking. We even put him in touch with The Wife's older brother (our Parish Tax Assessor- who in fact is not even Mexican. The Wife's family is set up pretty weird), who has him do work for him all over the place (and before yall ask- yes, we do pay the guy well). I can't really speak to the family because my Spanish is awful, but I'll be damned if they are not some of the nicest, most hardworking people I know. Which brings us to last week- The Wife was cleaning out some of her old clothes, and thought to bring a few pairs of jeans over to the Mexican woman to try on. When she walked in the house, she tells me that the inside of the house is friggin' FREEZING. The landlord apparently refuses to supply the house with ac or heating. The only heat source that they were all huddled around was an old gas space heater that is not even supposed to be used inside. So after The Wife comes home and tells me this, we talk about it for a while an decide to help. We went and bought some small electric space heaters for their living and bedrooms that wouldn't choke everyone to death with carbon monoxide. I can't even tell you how cool it was after we dropped them off to hear The Wife translate the part of the conversation where the man told the two youngest boys that they "would be warm in their room tonight". Its kind of embarrassing to write this now, but their gratitude and the feelings that their reactions instilled in us kinda-sorta resulting in a giving-spree from us for them. We went after that and bought Christmas presents for all of the kids. We told my mom, who cleaned out her attic and gave us about 6 storage bins FULL of nice clothes for the mom to pick through, plus some nice jackets for the dad. I wish yall could have seen their faces when I started carrying all of that into their house. The mom was in tears as she was going through the clothes, telling The Wife that even the stuff that doesn't fit her, she knows other people who would really benefit as much or more than she would that she would pass the stuff on to. I really don't know where I'm going with this, but I guess just to sum up, it was an awesome experience and an amazing feeling, and I'm thankful that we were in a position to be able to help someone that you KNOW genuinely appreciates the act. It would have been better if The Wife would have let me yell "Vamos Mantequilla!!!" after we gave them everything, but she wouldn't and she punched me when I suggested it. What a bunch of bullcrap. So I don't know, I just thought that some of yall would like that story, and that some of you might have similar stories to share. Focus: This is the feel-good thread. Post happy thoughts. Forget about all things negative for just one thread and focus instead on the things in your life that you are thankful for. It can be Christmas related or not, it doesn't matter- just post something that makes you feel good inside.
I've been stopping at the same deli maybe once a week or so for about 7 or 8 years now. This morning I paid for my coffee and egg sandwich, and as I was turning to go, the guy called me back. While I stood there wondering what he was doing, he opened a paper bag, reached under the counter, pulled out a bottle of wine (keep in mind this store does not sell liquor) put it in the bag, wished me a Merry Christmas and gave it to me. I guarantee that wine will be making me feel good inside later tonight.
I am incredibly annoyed that I have to spend a grand just to get my car fixed up today, but I have had a very good year over all. Through the help of a friend, I was able to land a job, which in turn easily tripled the amount of money I was making. I have been able to buy my friends and family awesome Christmas presents, which is something I have never had the money to do. I am really more excited to give presents this year than ever before. Also my boss has time off from the 20th to the 27th probably. He is taking my spot on the rig I am on, and working through Christmas for me. As useless as he is, that is an incredibly kind gesture, and I am very thankful. I may be GODDAMNMOTHERFUCKER pissed about the car, but it's a necessary evil, and it could have been worse. If I continued to drive leaking transmission fluid I could have annihilated the engine.
Ever paid for the order for the person behind you in the drive-thru? It was done for me a few months ago at Tim Hortons (coffee shop) and now I do it every time I have a few extra bucks in my wallet. A guaranteed feel-good thing for me, and hopefully for the person behind me as well. Do it the next time you're in a drive-thru. It's a relatively inexpensive random act of kindness.
Nine times out of ten, I have to be the bad guy at my job. I have to be the person that puts people's sons and daughters in jail, scold them to get their lives together, pretty much be a complete bitch in order to get shit done. My voicemail is chock full of angry mothers and fathers telling me what a horrid person I am for putting their precious babies in jail for the holidays. As much as I let a lot of it roll off my back, I sometimes have a hard time wondering if what I do for a living is worth it. Last week someone on my caseload tested positive for opiates and benzos in my judge's courtroom. Normally I'd heave a heavy sigh that I had paperwork to fill out for his revocation but something nabbed my attention about why he tested positive. I shot up and said "Judge, I do believe he has a valid script for Hydrocodone and Alprazolam, if you'd let me check his file." Sure enough, in his file, there was a copy of his scripts he provided for me. The lab had forgotten to put his prescriptions into their computer. The judge took his file and said "Thank you for pointing this out. This offender is lucky to have such a bright officer supervising him." That felt nice, but the ultimate came from the offender himself when I called him later on that day: "Officer Pink, thank you so much. You really do care about us and want to make a difference in our lives. Thank you again." I smiled the rest of the day after that phone call. Sometimes I'm reminded why I work in my often thankless profession.
Certain movies and shows were great traditions when I was a kid. I didn't have brothers or sisters, so I was tightly knit with my older first cousins. They loved classic films, so every year at Christmas we'd watch It's a Wonderful Life--- which I liked because it's a real feel-good film and Jimmy Stewart's voice is the most hilarious thing ever. I mean, Jesus Christ what other human being has ever sounded that way? Then, we would watch White Christmas--- which was a sequel-cum-remake of Holiday Inn---in which both films fucking suck and only are famous because of everybody's favourite child beater Bing belting out "White Christmas". Trust me kids, that movie sucked. Don't ever watch it. Danny Kaye does NOT a convincing straight man make. I would still watch it with them every year with a smile, usually I would just throw popcorn at people in the dark and refuse to own up to it. I was a sneaky little ninja (and this was the 80's when ninjas were cool). Things improved when Christmas Story got thrown into the mix. Let's face it-- the film is weird and kinda mean, but its left field moments are classic: my favourite is when Ralphie beats the bullies' asses like running mules. That was so awesome seeing that. Then, as I got older I learned that Santa kicking Ralphie in the face is MUCH funnier. Then, Christmas Vacation. I have said enough about that one over the years, but that, Bad Santa and The Ref all get watched over the course of Christmas Eve and Day by my wife and I. I usually sneak Die Hard in for good measure.
I refuse to donate money or time to very large charitable organizations. Too often I read about how very small percentages go towards those in need. Really pisses me off. Well, I'm an avid cyclist and to save money and feel safer on my bikes, I've learned how to wrench every aspect of a bike. My current bike was built up from a frame including lacing my own wheels, etc. I'm no pro by any means, but my skills get better by the year and I feel safe enough to go 40 down a steep descent on little ass tires on a bike that I tightened every bolt. I ride with a great group based out of my church here in town. We found the group first a few years ago and then a couple years later ended up joining the church. The last three years, a couple of us have gotten together and organized a used bike drive for local families with children who can't otherwise afford to buy bikes for their kids. We have a large group of people find gently used bikes and drop them off at our (mechanics) houses. We fix, replace, rebuild, tune up, etc. these bikes and get them ready for donation. We have a charity ride in the summer and collect donations this time of year to help fund parts, cleaning supplies, and new helmets for every bike. We have averaged around 70 bikes each year. The church has a day in early December where vetted families can "shop" at the church for donated toys. This now includes our bikes. Usually a few hundred families in the area qualify and come by. Nothing better than seeing the looks on these kids faces when they walk away with a new bike, or at least new to them or the happiness on parents faces knowing they're going to put a bicycle under the tree for their kid. Hell, many of these bikes still have unworn knobs on the tires. We make sure they're in the best shape possible and perfect for the kids. One guy last year was having a really bad year. You could just tell how much of a struggle things were for him. He had three kids and I found him three perfect bikes. One of them was a mid-level trek mountain bike easily worth $600 on the low end to move it quickly. It was too big for his kids, but I told him to take it and sell it. Talking to him, he was familiar with craigslist and felt comfortable listing it. I guarantee he had no problem selling that bike as it was a really good bike in near new condition. All I had to do was oil it do minor tweaks to the shifting. Replace that bike with a much cheaper new bike for his oldest child and use the hundreds of dollar difference for whatever. He was speechless. Not only did he get new bikes for his kids but I like to think he also got a few weeks worth of food and a couple utilities paid as well. I don't have much time, money or skills overall, but I try to give of it them what I can. I have never wanted for anything like I see so many in my own back yard. No matter where I go, I will always try to help those that are right in front of me. Not to knock too much on big national or international groups, but in this day I see good local people struggling and I see a real tangible effect by helping them rather than sending $20 a month to some kid in Africa. Again, that's worthy too, but for me there is nothing better than seeing the effects first hand of your little contributions. Hopefully some of these kids will turn around and give their bikes to somebody else or donate their time and skills down the road and pay it forward. Looking past the horrible consumerist marketing that starts before Halloween now, Christmas is still a pretty damn good time of year.
I'm, posting pretty early in the morning aren't I? It's because I'm in Austria. A little over a year ago I met the girl of my dreams. On our first date she let me know that she would be moving to Austria to teach English with a program through our college. Being me, I didn't take it too seriously, because it was a long time in the future and seemed like a problem that future me could deal with. September came, she moved, and I was heartbroken. But now, after the worst plane flight of my life, I'm sitting on her bed waiting for her to take her lunch break. I've eaten nothing but deer meat and curry wurst for the past 3 days. I can't understand a word of German, but other than that it's been a while since I was this happy. Of course in a few weeks I'll be back in America again, but that's something future me can deal with.
I haven't done it in a while, but I spent several years volunteering for Habitat for Humanity every Saturday. Besides the foreman, I was the only one who actually showed up every week. It was an outstanding experience. Every part of it. I learned a lot about building houses, got to play with tools, and the families I helped were simply amazing. One family was living in a very poor part of the city - a rough neighborhood that was not safe. They had three kids, two of whom were being drawn into the groups of neighborhood troublemakers. The third child was 6 years old and had been held up at knifepoint for his rusted out bike while pedaling around the bottom of his driveway. They all showed up and worked their asses off every week for this house. Even the little one. They expressed so much gratitude towards me for helping them - there was a real camaraderie there. The volunteer groups came and went, but we were always there together. After the house was done, we would visit them for meals and chitchat. I gave their littlest one an old BMX bike that I had tuned up and put new tires on and got to watch him pedal around his new safe neighborhood, and in the church parking lot right there within sight of the front porch. Last I knew, the two older sons were on the honor roll at school and one of them had gotten a job. Similar story with an Afghan family. It was two sisters and a family friend taking care of their elderly mother. None of them were particularly strong, or skilled with a hammer, but they were out there working all the time. When the house was done, they would invite us for these enormous, traditional Afghan meals. They had been moved out of a poor neighborhood on the third floor to a place where their mother could actually leave the house (she did not cope with stairs well), store her medical supplies without fear of being burglarized, or even just have her own bed. One of the best things I've ever done. I haven't gotten into the Habitat chapter locally since I moved, but hope to do so soon.
I'm thankful for my former boss and current classmates. My former boss is an ex-military hard-ass who isn't very warm or personable. During the course of 3 years, I never heard him give a compliment or word of praise to any of his employees. He is an awesome PT, though. I learned a lot from him, and I'm thankful my first PT job was with him. While he is very gruff, he's also very generous. Every Christmas he gave everyone a turkey and a gift card to a nice restaurant in town. This was on top of a nice bonus. When I rehabbed my ankle, he refused to take my money. That was huge to me because my insurance doesn't cover much. I figured I would have an abbreviated bout of therapy and do the rest by myself. And, a few days ago I received a card in the mail from him. I haven't worked for this guy in 6 months, so I was surprised. He sent me the same gift card he gives employees and said he was proud of me for getting into school and doing well. It gave me warm fuzzies. He's also done a lot for my co-workers when they had a sick parent or spouse. (Ex: giving them as much time as they needed off work, having food delivered to their homes). He's never going to be a shoulder to cry on for someone, but he is kind. It's a good reminder to me that compliments and praise don't have nearly the same weight as kind actions. I'm also super thankful for my classmates. There are only 40 of us, so I was a little anxious before classes started. I thought, "I'm going to be with these people for the next 3 years. I hope everyone gets along. Shit could be a little unpleasant if not." For the most part, most everyone at least tolerates each other. I have a good group that I study with, and I'm so thankful for that. It makes studying a little fun and we help each other. During exam weeks we're at school 12+ hours a day, and miraculously, we get shit done and can still take breaks to joke around. So, yay classmates!
Last year the church that my parents attend decided to adopt a family in need for Christmas. My mom was one of the ladies who was put in charge. The family that the church adopted had ten kids and the parents worked at Taco Bell. In addition to getting gifts for all of the kids, one person butchered one of their hogs and gave it to them (which I thought was awesome). I went with my mom, one of the pastors, and another lady to deliver the gifts and the hog a few days before Christmas. As I walked into the tiny trailer that they lived in I was stunned. It was the nastiest, dirtiest, most foul place I have ever seen. I could not believe that people lived like that in my home town. There was noting in the kitchen. All the food they had was a giant pile of canned goods. The kids wanted to be held and just wanted some attention. They all wanted to open their gifts right then and couldn't take their hands off of them. The parents were clearly not the brightest people in the world and my heart hurt for these little kids who will never have the same chances and advantages I had despite being born in the same hospital and growing up four miles apart. It was very interesting to see them all interact from a social perspective. One kid tried to steal my wallet and another asked me several times for money. Another kid tried to steal the pastors wallet while his brother distracted him. I couldn't help but wonder how their lives would turn out and if they would end up better than their parents. After leaving that trailer, I have never felt so fortunate and lucky in my life. It was one of the few times that I felt I actually did something good for someone else without expecting anything in return.