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Exit Interview?? WTF?

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Angel_1756, May 2, 2014.

  1. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, and fuck you, I'm out!

    Focus: I gave my notice at work this week and part of the process is an exit interview. They sent me a copy of the questions and I'd like some help filling it out. I already have my letter of reference from these people and the answers to the exit interview are completely confidential, and I doubt very much that they'll act on any of the feedback I give anyway. To that end, would you all mind helping me fill it out? Feel free to be creative and descriptive. I give you all free reign with this component of my work life.

     
  2. FreeCorps

    FreeCorps
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    I'm not filling out that War and Peace type essay, but in my younger years I once had a job where, at the end of my two weeks, I walked into my boss' office and chucked my key card at his chest on my last morning. Surprisingly enough HR still wanted me to do an exit interview.

    But as an idea for your exit interview get a prop mic, walk in, drop it, walk out. Done.
     
  3. toddamus

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    Exit interviews are just bureaucratic waste. I doubt very much they take into consideration anyones comments. For example, asking about pay, everyone thinks they're underpaid so why ask that? Another example is the barriers question.

    And correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't you the person another woman said "If you have any trouble at your new work don't call us"?
     
  4. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    That is correct. Although that same woman came up to me the next day and apologized. Apparently that was supposed to be a joke.

    I agree exit interviews are kind of bullshit, but I've never done one before. I'd like to go out with a bang. For instance: "There weren't enough hot women here which resulted in my downturn in morale. From now on, I recommend you hire women who are at least 6/10 in the looks department, to help boost well-being in the office."
     
  5. Juice

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    Always give a glowing exit interview and say how much you like the company, culture, people, etc, even if you hate it.

    1) You're on your way out so it doesn't matter.

    2) You never know when you'll run into the same people again in your career.

    3) You never know who is networked with who.

    In the end, the potential upsides (or just avoidance of the downsides) are way better than pointlessly burning a bridge.
     
  6. Coke Bottle Casualty

    Coke Bottle Casualty
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    Have you heard of Planned Parenthood's new service for us gals on the go? It's like dabbawala but instead of a tiffin filled with butter chicken, you get a pale guy in scrubs holding a coat hanger and vacuum.

    While what you paid me was comparable to the daily take of a street urchin in Mexico City, I was able to supplement my income by performing phone sex with clients during my lunch hour.

    My first child was conceived on the very desk you're using.

    [Insert boss' name here] said he'd take care of me after the incident on your desk. He lied.

    After stating the company's firm belief that maternity leave is a "socialist ploy enacted by the Obama administration", despite the fact that this is a Canadian company, they shared with me the company motto: Preggos get Pink Slips.

    I'll finish the rest later.
     
  7. Frank

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    That's pretty much how I roll too.
     
  8. The Village Idiot

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    This is a tough one. I think your advice is unfortunately correct, but it tends to perpetrate continued asshatery in work places. I'm thinking of my experience where I had a psycho boss, but everyone that left before me did what you suggested, and it was the right move for them, undoubtedly. While my exit interview was circumspect at best, I'm glad I stood up and said what an asshole this boss was in a hearing (not instituted by myself by the way) later. It probably cost me my career for the time being, and though there were some changes as a result of that hearing, the boss was removed (and left the firm) a year later due to an internal sexual harassment investigation.

    In sum, the whole 'exit interview' thing is a strategy by employers to gloss over shitty conditions (that they are well aware of) in order to have 'plausible deniability' later.

    From the perspective of the employee, Juice is right, that advice keeps you moving forward.

    From the perspective of getting rid of shitty supervisors/culture/policies etc., it only helps perpetuate them by not telling the truth.

    Given the same set of circumstances would I tell the truth? I don't know, wish I could tell you I was a man of principle no matter what, but losing a career is a heavy price to pay and not sure I'd do it again.

    Overall, I'd err on the side of caution and leave with as little fuss as possible and hope for better futures over the horizon.
     
  9. ODEN

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    In the past WDT, I remarked that I was resigning and wanted to be "honest" in my resignation letter. After letting the liquor wear off a little bit, I took y'alls advice and made a rather terse, yet neutral resignation. The response was: "This doesn't tell me anything, I want to know why he is really leaving!".

    So. I was forced to have multiple exit interviews thanks to you ass clowns. It would have been so much easier to just say it in writing. In any case, this is a small-ish company trying to grow big and they wanted my opinion because I have worked for heavy hitters in the industry. So, I was honest. They asked lots of follow-up questions, made excuses, et cetera. Bottom Line: I told them that to get where they want to go they need to be prepared to suffer short-term pain and stop being so greedy. You know, start looking up at top line rev instead of micromanaging the fuck out of the bottom line. I did this without coming off as ranting, which turned out to be a good thing.

    They asked me if things didn't work out to come back....weird. The real downside has been that they have made me fulfill the full 2-week notice. So anyways, the whole "It's me, not you" routine is horseshit.
     
  10. Revengeofthenerds

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    Maybe.

    But do you think they would have sought your input, and offered you a fall-back option, had you been "truthful" in your resignation letter and laid it all out on the table then?

    Obviously, you were are are still valuable to them. I imagine you did some really important things. So when you turned in a "it's not you, it's me" resignation letter, you left them hanging, and they felt as if they did wrong. So they wanted to investigate to make it right.... Whereas if you gave them a letter that basically said "fuck you idiots, you're stupid, I'm out!!!" they would have just chalked it up to a good employee turning crazy.

    Everyone wants closure, an ending. We see things in narrative fashion. It's human nature. So if you leave a company (or anyone, really) a few chapters shy of a book, they're gonna go out of their way to write that conclusion. And by doing so, you've effectively put them on their heels, rather than the other way around. And now you're the one in control, and they're on the defensive.

    That's how you quit.
     
  11. ODEN

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    As has always been the case, I don't care what they want. A fair day's work for a fair day's pay; unless somehow they are going to up the ante to get me to care beyond that point. I don't owe them anything in the way of an explanation as to why and with how much suction they actually do suck.

    You are correct, I suppose, it is a narrative to which I wanted to put a period at the end of:

    [​IMG]

    Fuck 'em. May they choke on dick.