Eff It- El Drunk Thread De Thursday. WOO. 1/26/12

You are too white and too racist to use Nigga. The only exception is if you've had sex with a black girl (or guy, cocaine is one helluva drug) more than once.

Also, I love this website. yoisthisracist.com

 

Your day sounds way more awesome than mine.

Also, I think enjoyment of the butt secks depends greatly on the endowment of the gentleman with whom you are engaging in the act. I have had experiences ranging from totally awesome to absolutely excruciating, regardless of speed/amount of lube. (Obviously the range here has made me interested, but hesitant to keep trying?)

 

IT'S MY POOPER!! IT IS NOT A PLAYGROUND.


And...my day is going just fine. I have an energy drink with sweet tea vodka in it. hellzyeah.

 

Totally surprised that somebody hasn't made parts of this into a new sig.

 

Now that I think about it, I am definitely going to name my band Cold Hard Speculum.

 

YES. This.

Guys who worry about being sexually rejected for having a small dick should refocus their attention on backdoor activities. They'd be making butt secks converts almost every time they did it, too.

Honestly, there's a solution for almost every heterosexual male genital-related worry out there. Premature ejaculation? Your girlfriend only has to spend 2 minutes blowing you, so ladies with TMJ are your best option there. Small wang? Butt secks. Dick takes a sharp bend to the left? Creative positioning and a partner with a tilted uterus will make everything wonderful. Chronic erectile dysfunction? Perfect, there are tons of girls who have issues with penetration...find one of them and develop your oral skills.

Can't really think of a demographic that would appreciate gonorrhea, though.

 

I spent the whole of yesterday listening to the Hottest 100 countdown, drinking vodka slushies, throwing water bombs at people and going down a massive slime filled slip 'n' slide.

No hangover, my streak continues.

 

I outta here. Ten minutes down the road I'll be seeing THIS God-like band:



And I can't help myself. Watching Milly get his ass handed to him just never gets old. This video is a gift:

 

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To follow up on the Barracuda that izcorro posted I give you this.

 

That picture is missing the crabclaw.

Make a "C" with your hand. Now turn that upside down.

 

or movie...oh wait

 

What about "Cries and calls her by other girls names"? Not that I'd know anything about that....*








*Only one of these has happened.

 

There were some Australians at the bar last night. They were celebrating Australia Day by, apparently, listening to said Hottest 100 countdown. Is it a particularly big deal in Australia?

 

It's apparently the biggest music countdown in the world. A hell of a lot of people have Australia Day parties with the countdown. The radio station has all sorts of contests involved with it as well including giving someone who voted a ticket to every gig suported by the radio station for the next year.

 

I can smell the dried, sticky Lucky Lager on the plywood mattress board from my dorm room when this song plays.

 

WELL KEEP THINKING!!

 

The answer is obviously people who already have gonorrhea. I'd bet that dating site already exists, too.

 

Bingo.

<a class="postlink" href="http://www.stdloves.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.stdloves.com/</a>

 

I have to get up for work at 330 AM, so I'm going to go grab a beer. None of you are this dedicated. FUCKING NONE OF YOU. NOTHING!

PEACE OUT.