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Dirty Secrets

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Volo, Apr 9, 2011.

  1. Volo

    Volo
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    In honor of the shitstorm that will be unleashed on TiB once the Drunk Thread closes down.


    Why not makes things really uncomfortable for everyone?

    FOCUS: Tell a dirty secret of yours. This is not the time to have a conscience of shame of any kind.

    I used to jerk off to the maternity models in the Sears catalogues. I was 13.

    We're all twisted, whether we choose to admit it or not.

    Go.
     
  2. DrFrylock

    DrFrylock
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    The White

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    If you want to post a reply but don't want to do it under your username, either:

    • PM it to me and I will post it without your identifying information
    • Email it (anonymously if you like) to me at dslxo4k@tempalias.com

    Oh and...
     

    Attached Files:

  3. Maltob14

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    Who else is kind of hoping these are the only 3 posts?

    Maternity models huh?
     
  4. heideman

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    Fuck that, this thread has charlie-sheen-esq-winning written all over it, duh.

    Saw my step sister naked when we were both fifteen, spank banked that for a while. She was a fatty.
     
  5. BadBrains

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    My wife and I had a threesome. Twice. With our kid's nanny.

    She was a hot little thing. Dirty in the bedroom.

    The hot little nanny also happened to be my brother's girlfriend.

    I am a horrible person.
     
  6. Primer

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    Seriously? This is your terrible kink secret? Hell, I motorboated that shit for kicks.

    I fisted my GF (well, she fisted herself, my hands are way too large to fit in a vagina and could only get two and a half fingers in) and it turned me on so much that I was a ten-pump-chump.

    Bring it*.

    *Except Scoota, he's auto-win.
     
  7. Juice

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    I beat off to vacation pictures of my friends mom in a bathing suit when I was 15.

    Difficulty: In their house.
     
  8. BL1Y

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    I like it in the ass (but only from girls).
     
  9. Nettdata

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    Duh.
     
  10. Frank

    Frank
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    Wait, are we talking finger in the asshole while getting a blow job or a strap on?
     
  11. Politik

    Politik
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    - During my first blow job I came so hard the girl starting hacking and spitting everywhere and sprinted out of the room. I felt proud.

    - I came in a girls mouth, pulled up my pants and walked away....twice.

    - Over the summer I devirginized my closest platonic female friend. While blackout drunk at 4AM in my best friend's backyard while his family was asleep. Best friend had to find her panties afterwards because we were too fucked up. My white shirt turned half red, too drunk to notice during sex. Unintentionally used the one Trojan Ecstasy (aka trojan for small dicks) in my wallet and had to buy her Plan B the next day.
     
  12. McSmallstuff

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    My first girlfriend, first time, and first love, were all the same person. That person was, and is, my step sister.
     
  13. Danger Boy

    Danger Boy
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    Oh man, I remember when I was in junior high.


    Focus:
    I hated my old room mate so much that I used to punch him in his stupid face when he was passed out drunk. It sounds like a shitty thing to do, but he was the fucking Antichrist. I could elaborate on why he deserved it but that would be an angry two page rant.
     
  14. PIMPTRESS

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    I cheated on my ex repeatedly. I am in no way proud of this. I loathed him and his addictions, the way he chose them over me made me feel he was cheating on me. So, I justified it.
     
  15. lust4life

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    My money's on hairbrush.
     
  16. roy jones

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    When Mrs. Jones and I got married, we moved into an old farmhouse. The bedroom was shitty, and we redid it.

    We got new carpeting from a local outlet place, and I called a former employer to see who lays the carpet for him. He gave me a guy's name, and I had him do it.

    On the day he laid the carpet, I had my dad go over and unlock the house for him. I forgot to leave him a check, and went out of town shortly thereafter.

    I returned home to find this man had called my house 12 times, and my employer 5 times in a 3 day period for payment.

    Being an asshole, I withdrew the $200 from an ATM and shoved it down my pants so that it rested under my balls. I then walked around with the money like this for a few hours, and then I settled my debt.

    I've masterbated to Sesame Street. I don't remember the context, just that this girl (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0143935/) was jumping around alot and she has bouncy boobies.

    EDIT: Fixed link (I think)
     
  17. Nom Chompsky

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    The first time I got head, I faked an orgasm.
     
  18. ryan mc

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    I am no longer in love with my fiancee, and I plan to leave her as soon as I am able.

    That will be the worst thing I have ever done to her, the next worst being I fucked some random woman two nights before I moved in with the fiancee.

    Clearly I should never have proposed. I'm not proud.
     
  19. Juice

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    Well you know what they say, anal sex is like spinach. If you're forced to have it as a child, you're not going to enjoy it as an adult. I suppose the reverse is also true.

    Focus: One I forgot in my original post was, in high school, a gir sat on my lap at a party and I blew my load immediately (She never knew). Casanova right here, ladies.
     
  20. Danger Boy

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    I've been asked to elaborate on this, so I'll give you some examples (spoilered for length).

    A few guys and me lived in an old house that had those open vents between the upper and lower levels. One of these vents was right above the shower, so you could see down into the shower from upstairs. This was great for dumping pots of ice cold water on house mates while they were showering. It was also nice for when one of the guys' girlfriends would spend the night and use the shower in the morning.
    The Antichrist took it a step farther. One night, I was just getting done showering. I shut the water off and was about to grab my towel when I felt something dripping. Then I noticed it was warm and coming from directly above me. Then I noticed the piss smell.
    The motherfucker pissed on me through the vent. I could hear him laughing up there. After screaming obscenities at him and explaining how I was going to end his life, I waited for the piss to stop dripping through the vent and fired up the shower again to clean off. When i got out he had the nerve to deny the whole thing, saying "I just poured a drink on you" and "I wouldn't do that."

    Another time, he fucked his girlfriend in the ass in my bed and left the dirty rubber laying on my pillow. I found this out the hard way.

    Then there was the time he was drunk and wandered upstairs because he had to piss (even though the bathroom was downstairs). I wasn't home at the time. After doing some searching he couldn't find a toilet upstairs, so he took the next logical step: He took a pair of my jeans out of my dresser, laid them out on the floor, and soaked them in piss.

    These are just a few examples out of many, many shitty things he did to me for no reason other than he was a bad drunk.