Adult Content Warning

This community may contain adult content that is not suitable for minors. By closing this dialog box or continuing to navigate this site, you certify that you are 18 years of age and consent to view adult content.

Dear Management: Someone's nude on the 14th hole

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Angel_1756, Jun 11, 2012.

  1. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
    Expand Collapse
    The Big Four-Oh

    Reputation:
    380
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    3,909
    Location:
    The T-dot O-dot one-of-a-kind
    This story hit the news in Toronto today - in Atlanta, a very prestigious private golf club received a letter outlining some complaints about the behaviour of the club members.

    The letter in its entirety:
    • "I have heard that, during and after the latest member/member golf tournament, a great deal of — to put it mildly — inappropriate behavior occurred.

      I have heard the following:

      * several members decided to play several holes with no shirts. I am sure that this is contrary to the rules of the golf course. Had this been the only infraction of good manners that apparently occurred at the tournament, I would not be writing this letter.

      * one member decided to play the hole completely naked. I have not researched it, but I suspect this is a crime in Georgia.

      * several members urinated on one of the greens, in the presence of the caddie. a female, and one or more of the members deliberately exposed themselves to her while urinating. I suspect this is also a crime in Georgia.

      * one member decided to show off to other members, and a caddie, his ability to pick up a golf ball with his naked butt cheeks. I suspect that this behavior — if it occurred at Bobby Jones Golf Course — would have resulted in a call to the police and the arrest of the offender.

      * several members decided to deliberately hit onto the green while the group ahead of them was putting on that green, with the announced intention of hitting the members who were putting. I don't know if you've ever been hit by a golf ball, but I believe that if a golf ball hits someone in the head, it can be fatal, or if it hits someone in the eye, the victim can be blinded in that eye. I don't know if deliberately trying to hit someone with a well struck golf ball is a crime in Georgia, but I suspect that it probably falls within one or more criminal statutes.

      * On Friday night, one of the drunken golfers passed out in the men's grill, and another member opened his pants, pulled out his penis, and slapped the passed out member's head with his penis.

      * On Friday night, after the golf day was finished, several members were extremely drunk and disorderly. (I suppose this is no surprise — I am told that on Friday alone, more vodka and beer was consumed than had ever been consumed in the two days of any prior member/member tournament).

      * On Friday night, the noise made by several of the drunken and disorderly members was so obnoxious that a rehearsal dinner in the main dining area of the golf club was, of course, disturbed. When someone from the rehearsal dinner came into the men's grill to ask that the drunken members quiet down, the response from one of the drunken golfers was "Go fuck yourself."

      * relations between the drunken golfers and rehearsal dinner did not improve — apparently several of the drunken golfers decided to "moon" the persons attending the rehearsal dinner.

      In my mind, this behavior — if true — is horrific. I hope the Board has investigated, with both the golf club staff and the caddies on duty during the tournament, any and all allegations of such behavior.

      If it is true that the drunken members disturbed the rehearsal dinner in any of the ways that I was told, I hope the Club has completely refunded the charges to the host of that dinner, and fined the drunk and disorderly members in at least an equal amount.

      If it is true that any member has (i) cavorted naked on the golf course; (ii) urinated on a green in the presence of a caddie; (iii) deliberately hit onto a green with a group was putting; (iv) or "mooned"' anyone at the Club. I hope the Board has (a) expelled those members and (b) will publicly post a report of such behavior and the sanctions imposed.

      This behavior is far more offensive. and far more corrosive to the health and well being of the Club, than the late payment of a bill, which is routinely posted to bulletin boards throughout the Club, presumably to shame those guilty of such an infraction. This behavior, if confirmed, and the sanctions imposed by the Board, should be well publicized throughout the Club. Among other things, let the wives and children of these drunkards be confronted with, and ashamed by, the grotesque conduct of their husbands and fathers.

      By the way, I don't think our staff can be expected to stop such behavior all they can be expected to do is to ask a member to behave appropriately, and if such a request is disregarded, report the misbehavior to the Board. The Board should be quick to impose harsh sanctions on such behavior only then can we expect it will not be repeated.

      I also hope the Board will discuss these events in detail, and the Board's actions in response to this behavior, at the upcoming Annual Meeting.

      I would also appreciate it if you would forward copies of this letter to other officers of the Club, the members of the Board, and the members of the golf committee."
    Some selected excerpts:

    • * one member decided to play the hole completely naked. I have not researched it, but I suspect this is a crime in Georgia.

      * several members urinated on one of the greens, in the presence of the caddie. a female, and one or more of the members deliberately exposed themselves to her while urinating. I suspect this is also a crime in Georgia.

      * one member decided to show off to other members, and a caddie, his ability to pick up a golf ball with his naked butt cheeks. I suspect that this behavior — if it occurred at Bobby Jones Golf Course — would have resulted in a call to the police and the arrest of the offender.

      * On Friday night, one of the drunken golfers passed out in the men's grill, and another member opened his pants, pulled out his penis, and slapped the passed out member's head with his penis.

    Focus: The best (or worst) behaviour you've seen (or been part of) at a sports facility or sporting event.

    I've seen my fair share of naked dudes running around at the Blue Jays games in Toronto, and I was lucky enough to see four extremely hot chicks mooning the Toronto lacrosse team a few years ago. Not being a parent, I've not been privy to the "crazy soccer mom" or "insane hockey dad", but I'm sure you all have some doozies to tell.
     
  2. guernica

    guernica
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    7
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    829
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    They may have beaten us the last 7 years in a row, but at least our fans never did this

    [rnsfw]Adult lady pissing into a seat[/rnsfw]

    That stadium holds 50000+ and is full. You stay classy
     
  3. crazy asian

    crazy asian
    Expand Collapse
    Experienced Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    151
    Location:
    ny
    This one isn't crazy-funny, it's crazy-stupid.

    The 2006 jr. kickboxing world champs weigh-in happened in a large arena with great acoustics. Thousands of underage fighters of both genders in peak training condition are hanging out, meeting each other and weighing in when a loud scream is heard from the women's locker room. The entire population of the arena rushed to the site of the scream to find that some coach assistant had attempted to sexually assault one of the girl fighters. The girl seemed fine, I'm pretty sure she got a few good hits in, actually. The assistant coach...not so much. Ever try to fight off several nations worth of their best fighters?

    Of all the places to try to molest/attack someone, this may have been the stupidest. Dumbass.
     
  4. Juice

    Juice
    Expand Collapse
    Moderately Gender Fluid

    Reputation:
    1,389
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    13,425
    Location:
    Boston
    Go to a Patriots game and observe the Patriots fans.

    I love the team, but god damn the fans can be assholes.
     
  5. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
    Expand Collapse
    The Big Four-Oh

    Reputation:
    380
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    3,909
    Location:
    The T-dot O-dot one-of-a-kind
    I forgot one. I was at the Hamilton Tiger-Cats game when a fan did this:
     
    #5 Angel_1756, Jun 11, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  6. katokoch

    katokoch
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    477
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,631
    Location:
    Minneapolis
    It's not on par with crazy's story, but one high school wrestling tournament I was in got briefly held up when some drunken dumbass tried to pick a fight with a wrestling coach. Of course you're a winner when you are in a rural high school gym on a weeknight reeking of cheap booze, but the guy had to swing at a former D1 heavyweight wrestler while he was at it. It was pretty entertaining to watch him eat linoleum after that.
     
  7. Eastcoaster

    Eastcoaster
    Expand Collapse
    Average Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2009
    Messages:
    82
    Where I live there is a very large annual senior hockey tournament (players are 35 years and older). Completely recreational, it's more beer drinking than hockey playing. Mainly dads getting away with the guys for a weekend. All fun. Except there's always an asshole. I play in the tournament and will go watch a game or two if i know some of the players (and to have a beer). anyway, I'm watching a game and there are a set of elderly people watching with their grand kids, who looked about 5 or 6 years old. There's also one drunk asshole swearing at one of the teams. Rink is very small and this guy can be heard from every where. The grandfather asks him, very politely, if he wouldn't mind stopping with the profanity. Asshole walks up to grand dad and pushes him down the bleachers. Grand mom and grand kids are crying, i'm running over to help grand dad. What i didn't see was that the kids father, who was playing, saw the whole thing. He skates over with two other players and they jump the glass. The two other players takes kids and grandma away, father pucks the face off this asshole. Grand dad was ok, little scratch on the shin. nobody called the police or ambulance, and the guys didnt miss a shift, although everyone playing stopped to watch.
     
  8. Renholder

    Renholder
    Expand Collapse
    Experienced Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    231
  9. KIMaster

    KIMaster
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    1
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    1,870
    That's actually kind of awesome. Not even the fact that they were speaking out against CANCER deterred Philly fans from booing the enemy players! I wouldn't call booing particularly bad behavior, either; that's just plain cool.

    Focus-

    My favorite is the Oklahoma college football fan who LITERALLY ripped a Texas fan's testicles off in a bar fight.
     
  10. lhprop1

    lhprop1
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    1
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    1,164
    I may or may not have been a participant in multiple co-ed naked rugby matches at one time or another. That, in and of itself, is completely fine. What was very unsporting was the multiple couples that would undoubtedly tackle one another and hold onto the tackle for a little too long. Trying to play rugby with a dozen couples scattered randomly about the field, fucking their brains out, is very unsportsmanlike.
     
  11. Allord

    Allord
    Expand Collapse
    Disturbed

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    388
    Location:
    The Nightmares of children with a 30" Dildo
    I did not know Tucker Max was an avid golfer. You learn something new every day.

    When I was on the high school cross country team they used to take their sport very seriously. To the point where we'd start pre-pre-pre practicing for the season about 6 months before it even began, so early that the coaches weren't even legally allowed to coach us, and the students would have to arrange practices amongst themselves.

    In this same vein, after we'd gotten through the pre-pre-pre-season and the pre-pre-season, and were mired in the pre season we would make a yearly excursion to Mammoth Mountain for a week for altitude training, team bonding, and a more individualized approach to coaching. I only went once, but apparently when we arrived that year the hotel staff were relieved to see us.

    Apparently the group who had just left was a christian youth group that were there for a week, and in that short time they had wreaked as much destruction as humanly possible. They had made a mess of the rooms they'd stayed in, they had destroyed the furniture in the rooms, they had painted the walls with some unidentified substance, and apparently at one point some of them managed to work their way into the air vents where they proceeded to crawl all over the building while tearing out insulation.

    It makes you wonder what they're like at home.
     
  12. Luke 217

    Luke 217
    Expand Collapse
    Disturbed

    Reputation:
    4
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    393
    Location:
    Provo. Spain?
    I've been to 5 or so Kentucky Derby's. I've never seen a single horse race. In fact one year I don't remember going to the track, or leaving.


    The last time I was there I left in handcuffs. Some dude took a swing at me (I didn't see it) and my buddy knocked him the fuck out.
    My buddy got pissed at me when the cops dropped us off outside the track, took the cuffs off and told us that we weren't arrested,, and then I told the cops that they dropped us off on the wrong side, my car was on the other side.
    The cop just looked at me and shook his head.
     
  13. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
    Expand Collapse
    Just call me Topher

    Reputation:
    951
    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2009
    Messages:
    22,739
    Location:
    London, Ontario
    I cannot standhome team fans that threaten and badger visiting fans. Give them credit: they had the sand to show up in the lion's den with the other gang's colours on.

    One place I am yet to experience this is at (of all things)Toronto Maple Leafs games. I love going to the ACC for its tip-top service and you would think it was be lunacy me wearing full Sabres gear around the craziest fans in hockey, but they are great sports and the worst thing I've had happen to me was a group wanted to pose in a photo pretending to laugh at me one night the Sabres lost. I've even had beers bought for me. Good peoples.
     
  14. Dcc001

    Dcc001
    Expand Collapse
    New Bitch On Top

    Reputation:
    434
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,736
    Location:
    Sarnia, Ontario


    And you thought Ricky Bobby wasn't real.
     
    #14 Dcc001, Jun 11, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  15. Vorticon

    Vorticon
    Expand Collapse
    Experienced Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2010
    Messages:
    118
    Location:
    NZ
    I've seen my fair share of streakers being smashed by security guards, smashed by players or just being dragged out by police. I've seen only one where they got away clean. This happened at about 11:30am on a Friday morning, after 5,000 people joined a facebook group he setup. To be fair to the man, unlike those usual [if x number of people join I will...] groups, he actually followed through.
     
  16. scootah

    scootah
    Expand Collapse
    New mod

    Reputation:
    12
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    1,750
    On of my in laws is very involved in the mining and construction and farm supplies industry in a kind of small rural town. That town is however at the center of very substantial industrial works and cattle farming with a shitload of money going through them. I forget exactly what he does - but it's something with a shitload of money around it. Every year, the town has a Debutante ball sponsored by my cousin in law's company, which he MC's and organizes. The debutantes however are all senior executives from the mining / construction /farming industry. They tend to all be big rough super macho types and rampantly homophobic. But it's a tradition for the boss and a couple of the senior guys from all the big companies to get dressed up in drag and be part of the presentation and talent show, and then be auctioned off for dances with all proceeds going to childrens charity. One of the debutantes is crowned queen at the end of the night. The dances are horrifying since the /winners/ are usually 6'4 and built like brick shit houses, wearing heels for the first time in their lives, and often wearing VERY racy outfits. Micro dresses with garters and thigh highs with G-strings, etc. Pole dancing for the talent portion of the show and lap dances given to the judges. My favorite part about the night is that almost every one of these guys booty shaking in awkward heels would probably beat you to death you if you accused him of being a poofter.

    The day after the ball, there's a golf day at the local golf club to determine the 'king', which sounds like it has a lot in common with the one being complained about in the OP. The crowned queen of the ball gets frocked up again and chauffeured around the golf course selling booze and raffle tickets for the charity. Usually while absolutely shitfaced 'herself'. I've been the chauffeur a couple of times over the years and it's a fucking mess. The golfers are all complete white trash bogans most of the time - so half of them show up with 2 happy gilmore style antique golf clubs and 3 six packs of beer for the day. There's now an actual rule that golfers should not attempt to drive beer bottles off the tee as they will not travel further than the balls no matter how hard you hit them and the glass is dangerous and difficult to clean up. The rule doesn't mention that the year that it became necessary to prohibit that behavior, a good number of the bottles were full of urine when they tee'd them up.

    I've seen many attempts at vehicular manslaughter with a golf cart. I helped fish the very drunk queen of the ball out of a water trap after 'she' tried to bestow a victory kiss to the king of the golf tournament. Mooning doesn't even register any more. I've seen people tee off out of someone's ass. I've seen an impromptu long drive tournament held in the car park, toward the members car park, by golfers who were one handing the club while drinking over proof rum out of the bottle. I saw a guy who was roof surfing on a golf buggy fall off, break his wrist, and finish his round, one handing his club while holding his beer between his cheek and shoulder. He only started getting someone else to hold his cigar after the third time he dropped it while taking a swing.

    Everything that gets broken gets cleaned up and paid for in the end. The participants are all locals and all fucking loaded - but it's as close to a riot as anything I've ever seen. I helped out a couple of times as a volunteer, but after the last one I went too, I'd want fucking danger pay to go back.
     
  17. Noland

    Noland
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    41
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    2,237
    Location:
    New Orleans
    The best part about this is I know these people. I don't know whoever these guys are specifically, but I know them. I know far too many annoyingly wealthy members of the lucky sperm club who are members of New Orleans' version of this country club and if this guy thinks this is the first time any of this crap has happened he's delusional.

    There is no group of people anywhere more depraved and completely willing to ignore other people's sensibilities than "born rich" kids. (I'm not judging, mind you. Hell, I wish my grandfather had been bright enough to buy a Rhode Island sized piece of useless marshland back in the 30s that happened to be sitting on an ocean of oil so I could realize my lifelong dream of being an international dilettante.)
     
  18. Treble

    Treble
    Expand Collapse
    Average Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2009
    Messages:
    50
    I distinctly remember watching a game (on TV) at Foxboro in which the head ref called time to politely entreat New England fans to stop throwing re-frozen snowballs at the away bench. The spirit of competition is really, um, healthy up there I guess.
     
  19. rei

    rei
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    16
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    1,273
    Location:
    Guelph, ON
    I go to the ACC decked out in Habs gear all the time. You get shit from drunk people after a Leafs win as people file out into Union but otherwise it's just very friendly ribbing between the two fanbases.
     
  20. Omegaham

    Omegaham
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    3
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    879
    Location:
    Oregon
    For all the stupidity that sometimes happens, fans in America and Canada tend to be relatively polite toward each other. Even in Boston, when the Yankees come to town, most people will only go as far as the Yankees Suck Chant (which is everywhere, including football games). I was amazed when a British friend of mine told me that they actually have to fence off fans from different teams for soccer games because riots have broken out.