How in any way could your life be made prime time PG. I think it's got to land closer to HBO original series and even then they may say "too many tits" However I like the friends theme, you could name the episodes in the same fashion.. "The one where everyone has sex with everyone" "The one where I spank everyone" "The one where I mow the lawn" "The one where I got my awesome beard hat" "The one where I met the message board Part 1" (season ender) I did find it funny when after a weekend of camping packing everything up our 2 friends were actually just watching the wife and I kids pack things up and banter about and friend laughed and said it was like watching a sitcom. I laughed back and explained that she was simply watching it because she was massively hungover and couldn't reach the remote to change the channel (walk to where everyone else was hanging out). You know the same reason you realize you just watched the George Lopez show followed by My Wife and Kids with Damon Waynes.
Tom Hanks would play me. The doughy, pudgy Tom Hanks, with short hair. The plot would revolve around me . . .I mean, Mr. Hanks . . . . being stranded in a local package goods store/bar with his only friend, a volleyball that says "Bud Lite" on it, given to Hanks by the "Bud Lite Bimbos" during a happy hour event. As the other bar denizens rotate in and out of the scenes over the course of 12 years, Hanks occupies the same corner bar stool, learning to subsist on beer nuts, beef jerky, and expired, single-serving packages of potato chips. Eventually Hanks finds a business card on the floor with the phone number of a cab company. He returns home to find his wife and child have moved on, but starts up a romance with the saleswoman for a wholesale beer distributor who lives down the street. Supporting cast, to be played by TiB members, selected due to physical or personality resemblance to the actual people in the "reference" bar: Volleyball - Durbanite Bartenders - Pimptress, Scootah Lone African American patron of bar - Nom Other bar patrons, who rarely, if ever, appear sober - ToyToy, dixiebandit, Nettdata, Hooker, Blue Dog, Aetius, Ballsack 4.0, Bigperson Teetotaler at bar for 20 minutes each day, drinks a soda while talking about electronic engineering, then leaves - lust4life
I know so many people that tend to float in and out of my life depending on the week or month; so the supporting characters would be difficult to cast. Danielle Radcliffe would be perfect to portray me because I bear a very uncanny likeness to him. Due to a weird speech impediment that gives me a quasi-British accent our voices would also match up as well. The only differences are I'm nearly a foot taller (6'4), and I have a Abe Lincoln style beard. The only other person I could think to cast in this sitcom as a regular character, would be BabyMamma (played by Julia Volkova); they're both on the short side with black hair, although BabyMamma is slightly more curvy.
So did Nom in his broken link. I'd go with the method acting route though. No one to play a paranoid coke head anti semite than the king of crazy himself.
Whoops, sorry, didn't see it because it was broken. Although someone did mention it awhile back in another thread so I did steal somebody's material. I'm a thief!
I'd like to see him branch out though, he played a dimwit in Arrested Development and in Veep. An egomaniac reformed coke head would be a big change.
I've put a lot of thought into this for some reason. I've been writing notes and everything. But I think I've made my decisions. I'm going to agree with Cowbell and say that I would be played by Kat Dennings. I was considering Aubrey Plaza, but I think since I am such a remarkably complex character that I would need an actress with more range than deadpan and sarcastic. My dad would be played by Chris Noth, because Big reminds me a lot of my dad (and of my ex-boyfriend, which is how I realized I was doing the whole "dating your dad" thing). My best friend would be played by Lizzy Caplan, even though she's half black/white, but I couldn't think of any black actresses that would suit her. Another friend of mine would be played by Jemima Kirke, who plays Jessa on Girls, because she has a lot of Jessa-like qualities and they look pretty similar. The guy who played Jonathan on 30 Rock would play my roommate. My Big-esque ex-boyfriend/current friend was really difficult to cast. He would need someone who could be very brooding and intense but also very funny and silly. The closest I could come up with is Joseph Gordon Levitt, even though he's both hotter and more of a dick than Levitt, and I think he would be really mad about that pick. I want Mindy Kaling in my sitcom. I don't know anyone she could play specifically, but in the show she would be my boss, even though my bosses never tend to have a big or important role in my life. But she would in the show. I also want Retta in my sitcom, so I'm going to cast her as my best friend's mom, even though in real life she's the white parent and in the show my best friend would not have a black parent. BUT IT'S MY SITCOM. I would have the guy who plays Nick on New Girl play my love interest, even though he doesn't remind me of any of my love interests in particular, but he would be good at playing the guy that tends to be my love interest. Lastly, I would have Julie Klausner play the role that my dad's ex currently plays in my life, as the mother figure that lives in the city. She'll pop up every few episodes when I need advice and we'll gab over drinks or manicures or something and generally be hilarious together. Although she's not really old enough to be my mother figure, so maybe she'll be my older sister or something. I just want her in the show because I feel like we'd be best friends and I'm currently trying to get her to hire me as her assistant.
So, you're telling me New Girl is not, in fact, a documentary about your life? I may have to reconsider some things........... Anyway, the TiB(ette) sitcom. Dcc Spoiler SheGirl Spoiler Audrey Spoiler Bewildered, I guess Spoiler "And the caaaaaaard attached would say, Thank you for being a frieeeeeeeeeend!" edit: Hopefully images show up now.
I know it's not exactly the focus, but I prefer films to tv, so shove it. Mine would go such as: Spoiler Jonah Hill (somewhere between his fat and skinny-ish phases), is agoraphobic nerd and possible homersexual mav_ian, who is on a crash course with suicide. In an effort to give up on life he drops out of his study, drinks as profusely as he sweats, takes up smoking, stubbornly refuses to move out of his small town to be closer to his friends, takes nightshift work at McDonald's, and spends a pathetically enormous amount of time on an internet messageboard. Through mutual friends he meets an angelic and apparently celibate Afrikaans girl (played by Kylie Botes). Spoiler In a frustratingly non-sexual fashion, she reveals to him that life doesn't have to be all misery, and her faith in Christianity helps him embrace his newfound atheism. He turfs his anti-depressants and cigarettes in favour of becoming a stoner. She returns to her country (to be suffer a trauma too tasteless to be repeated here), and eventually goes to teach English in Asia. Back at his brainless job, mav_ian meets a pixie-like pathologically shy girl (as played Julie Estelle): Spoiler The two get along, until one day she abruptly leaves her dickish, kleptomaniac, liar of a long-time boyfriend, who is also the nightshift manager, to stay with her sister in the big city. Eventually she returns and after some painfully polite awkwardness, our hero asks her out. The two lose their virginity to each other and build a relationship based on video games, action movies and nerf guns. She introduces him to extreme metal, he helps her deal with issues that stem from being a childhood leukaemia survivor, and they both quit McDonald's. Two years go by and their son is born, healthy after an intense emergency in the delivery room. Our hero returns to study and is all the better for it. The son will play himself, I think for obvious reasons: Spoiler On second thoughts, no one would believe this shit.
Hey, parents, tell me your kid isn't cuteness personified. And parents; tell me you didn't think every other baby you saw since was ugly... And single people: Don't tell me my son looks like Maggie Gyllenhaal, he's cuteness personified... [I gotta stop laughing at my own jokes. And I gotta stop thinking of my first born son as my "damn weiner kid."]