If I'm on my way to my honeymoon, is it too much to ask that you maybe splurge on a nicer rental? I'd prefer to change the tire on a Jaguar, thankyewverymuch!
Originally bought without any thought for the happy couple, Cousin Terry's gift of a metric socket set turns out to be the best wedding present ever.
Does she have a sister who is single? Seriously, I haven't dated a woman yet who could change a tire. I've gotten calls at 4 am to go change a tire for a girl. Edit: Let me rephrase/clarify what I just said. Yeah, the girls knew how to change a tire in theory, but little details like ACTUALLY HAVING A SPARE TIRE, A JACK, A LUG WRENCH, etc. were lost on them. Whatever, I can't be too hard on them; I still have forgotten to put the jack back in my car. I'll probably get a flat as soon as I'm done on here. Damn I can be a dumbass some times.
And in a moment of clarity, Frank was no longer angry that his new bride used to fuck a tow truck driver.
No honey...You had a hard day of drinking to much, embarrasing me in front of my family, and trying to make out with my sister. You take it easy. I've got this.
Bob sits quietly on the curb contemplating the consummation of marriage only moments after searching for the jack and discovering his wifes 12 inch strapon.
The bride-to-be's refusal to include a 24-hour roadside assistance program in the gift register quickly adds another example of regretfully poor decision-making to the day's tally.
I'm sorry dixiebandit, but that is seriously the worst caption I've ever read. Pete stopped for a rest on the curb. After driving through the ball pit at McDonalds, after accidentally running over that group of terminally ill leukemia children on the sidewalk, and after loading their frail broken bodies into his trunk, careful not to get any poor person blood on his suit, he needed a break. And that was the exact moment when the ghost of karmic retribution decided to strike and steal his hubcaps.