Thats what my girlfriend said when I told her people are faking their gluten allergies. We started joking about hypochondria, but the discussion turned into a heated debate on the merits of Celiac Disease. Shes now in the bedroom pissed off that Im "being so stubborn and stupid" about something I dont really know about. There goes my relaxing Saturday. Focus: Have you every had a half-hearted, joking debate with someone that turned into a real argument? Did it get physical?
"There's no way, dude. No way." "Are you kidding me? It's not even that long of a throw." "You're throwing Milkbones, not baseballs. No way you even get it close." We were at The Landing in Jacksonville for Florida/Georgia, and drunk as hell would be an understatement. Drunk enough that we were betting money with complete strangers that we could throw AND hit Georgia fans from the balcony of a second story bar with dog treats would be an accurate representation. Everyone in our group had a box and would occasionally taunt someone or toss them at them, in good fun, but after the game ended we were boisterous about the win and shitfaced to the point that we wanted to cross a line. Blonde girl in the liquor line? Let's throw one in her cleavage. Georgia fans standing right below us? Let's drop them in their drinks. We were challenging each other to increasingly difficult shots, all while earning the ire and annoyance of those around us. Someone finally walked up to us and said that we had to stop. I told him to pick someone in the crowd, and if I didn't hit them, I would stop. He picked someone pretty far away, but not so much that it was impossible. A difficult shot, sure, but I just invented this game no more than five minutes ago. I'm the best there is. The best there ever will be. Game on, you fucking party pooper. "There's no way, dude. No way." "Are you kidding me? It's not even that long of a throw." "You're throwing Milkbones, not baseballs. No way you even get it close." "It's impossible. It weighs too little, you don't have room to wind up, you have the wind to contend with, and it's a moving target." "Don't project your lack of talent onto me, guy." "A hundred bucks says you can't." "No thanks." "Pussy." "You're on." It took me a minute to figure out how to go about throwing it, but I did eventually and sure enough it nailed the guy right in shoulder. It's not that funny, but watching someone turn around and get angry at someone who they're not even sure where they are, is just....ugh, so rich. The guy refused to give me the money, and an argument ensued. Voices were raised, chests were puffed out. Punches were thrown, and of course security came in to break it up. I know it's Florida/Georgia and fights happen for reasons stupider than ours, but at the moment all I could do was laugh trying to explain it. "You see, what had happened was....he bet me I couldn't assault that stranger two hundred feet away with a Milkbone aerial assault....and then...."
Celiac disease is not an allergy, but an auto-immune response. Gluten proteins actually cause your intestines to attack themselves, and can cause some serious issues by damaging the ability of your intestines to absorb nutrients. People who claim allergy don't understand it, and are trying to justify their odd diet. After exposure to gluten, a real celiac sufferer like my brother in law will be sound asleep on his back, and then projectile vomit straight into the air before he can even wake up. Focus My wife and I had a half serious, half joking debate after the wedding when we were trying to figure out who gave us a full set of white towels. (Who uses white towels? Begging for that chance skidmark, no matter how hard you wash your asshole.) (Also, we don't live in a Motel 6) The towels didn't have a card on them, so we had no idea who gave them to us. I was convinced it was someone she invited, as she knows a ton of people with no sense of taste. She was convinced it was my side of the family, because she didn't want to admit so much of her family is trash. This turned from half joking, into what nearly became a deathly serious argument over who could have given us the shitty ass white towels. We had never fought before, and haven't since. I still think it was one of her ghetto ass coworkers.
I had a fight with the wench caused by this very fucking board. Dr Frynuts posted up this lameass psyche evaluation test, I did it and it showed a high level of narcissism (how trendy is that!) a slice of anti-social and a wee bit of histrionic action thrown in for spice (had to look that up) (After I finished masturbating to pictures of myself wearing a muscle T) I had LTMSette do the test, she finished then immediately shut the screen down and wouldn’t tell me what she got. I teased her a bit and played “the guessing game” That’s when the fight started. Still not sure if she was pissed that I was right or wrong. Not that it matters it was a fun game and I’m pretty sure I won.
I told my girlfriend that political science isn't a real science. I still haven't heard the end of this.
Just the other day I had a nice little fight with the girl. She was about to leave to go to a baby shower and I was going to sit at home watching TV. Before she left, she came over to me on the couch to say goodbye. I gave her a kiss, said something like, "Have a good time," and left it at that. She still stood there, as if she was waiting for me to say something else. So I looked at her and said, "Well...bye!" "What, are you trying to get rid of me?" She says this in a serious tone but with a smile on her face. "Well unless you want the hookers here while you still are, I suggest you get going." "Oh Ha Ha. No, you're just going to be watching porn" (Getting a little frustrated now, because she's also blocking the TV) "No, I'm just going to be watching TV." She keeps going on and on, but, oddly, without the smile on her face anymore. She's convinced I'm going to be watching porn on her computer. Her tone turns accusatory, so I feel like I now have to be defensive. Defensive quickly turns offensive and I tell her to "Just get the FUCK OUT!" She's pissed, and now so am I because she brought me to that point. She leaves in a huff and slams the door. To get back at her, I watch porn on her laptop.
Last semester of college I was living in a shithole with my best friend. Normally I'll drink tap water, but even when filtered the water from this place tasted like a dirty gym sock so I started buying bottled water. It began with subtle statements from him saying I was a wimp for it, by the end of the month my sexual preferences were being questioned and I was told I am no longer a man. One night we both got unbelievably drunk and while walking back home he stopped off at the bathroom sink to get some water and said I was a bitch if I went back to my room for bottled water. I immediately charged into the bathroom, cornered him against the wall and started delivering kidney punches. Being as drunk as I was it was pretty easy for him to get away, I follow him to the hall and we start fighting there. One of our neighbors is a 6'7" basketball player and he loudly exclaims "DAMN! You white boys are crazy." This causes us to stop fighting and erupt in laughter, he comes to our room with us and has a drink. After he leaves the room my roommate looks at me with a pissed off face and starts swinging. I bull rush him against the sink and start throwing head-butts. I'm so drunk this causes me to lose my balance and start falling back, my roommate takes this opportunity and cracks me in the face, I start bleeding everywhere. We both stop, look at each other and start cracking up, he runs to the store and grabs me a hungry man dinner and some ice. The next day we drive up to NY to have Thanksgiving dinner with his family. We are repeatedly questioned as to why his knuckles and my face look like hell. Alcohol is fun.
A situation like this actually happened last night between the girlfriend and I... It started with us watching the Canadian debates between the 4 party leaders and making fun of Gilles Duceppe. I brought up that his platform is ridiculous and the other party leaders, especially Harper do not take him seriously. My girlfriend was born and raised in Quebec, so it eventually became a debate between her and I about the preservation of the French language. I took the stance that it wasn't being threatened, but rather is being promoted with a lot of tax payer dollars at the expense of the English speaking community in Quebec. Also, how far would the Bloc QC go after their language is "preserved" and Quebec becomes their own country? After a few joking comments back and forth it quickly became a serious debate. It then became an argument of how I don't listen to what she has to say and then silence for the rest of the night. Ah politics..
Once, at lunch with some coworkers, we were discussing irrational fears when one piped up that she was terribly afraid of ghosts. I found this hilarious. She didn't understand what was so funny. At this point she flounced off. Later, when I apologized (because I kind of was a dick, even though being afraid of ghosts is ridiculous), she blew me off, like she'd pretty much always done. I stopped feeling bad about it, because I realized that the reason she was afraid people would come back to fuck with her is basically that she was a bitch to anyone who wasn't a generic white hipster. If I was that much of a bitch, I'd worry about invisible people too.
I once had an argument/debate with my girlfriend that lasted an entire evening. It was over the colour of a sweater she wanted to buy online. Me: Its red. Her: Its actually orange. It just looks red. Me: No, its red. If it looks red, it IS red. Her: You're wrong. Its just very very dark orange, so it looks red, but its not. Me:.... Her: Its just because you're a man. Women can see more colours and shades than men can! Now, I appreciate the science behind this, but there is no way i'm going to conceed and say that something which to me is 100% definitely just red is actually 'burnt orange' or 'dark amber' or some such bullshit made-up colours. So we ended up both being deliberately stubborn and refusing to back down. We never actually agreed - she wouldn't even see reason when all three of my housemates agreed with me that it was actually red. I still think I was right. If I can't see a colour, it doesn't exist.
I once got into a half-serious/ turns completely serious argument with someone based slightly on this concept. I was trying to explain the science behind the fact that women see color better than men as an evolution debate. The person I was arguing with refused to believe in evolution no matter how valid my argument was. This was a good friend of mine at the time, and this argument went from friendly to the two of us not speaking to each other. I haven't talked to this friend in about two years, indirectly due to this argument.
It's not an evolution debate, it's a DNA debate. The gene to see color is on the X chromosome, and each X chromosome has different color capabilities. So if you have 2 X chromosomes, you will be able to see more colors than if you have only 1 X chromosome.
Stupid boy, it is absolutely an evolution debate. Women see better colours to aid in the “gathering” part of hunter gatherer, i.e. "The chanteuse and aquamarine berries are bad for you, better not pick them". It’s also why spatial sense is attached to the Y chromosome, it helps with the “spear chucking” part of hunter gatherer. It’s also been theorised the instance of colour blindness is higher in men because it provides a better ability to pick out camouflaged predators. Everything you are is evolution baby.
It also means that men have a valid excuse not to have to sit there talking about chanteuse and aquamarine fucking berries.
My analogy regarding Chartreuse and Aqua Marine was even more apt that intended. Cool. Assuming AM is green also.
I stand corrected... HOWEVER. If someone is using that argument that evolution doesn't exist, will they also believe DNA doesn't exist? It's a way to get your point across without having to force anyone out of their intelligent design cocoon.