My penchant for unemotional sex and my busy work life had left me steering clear of relationships until I finally took the plunge. My first girlfriend was an old friend with benefits who became a friend when she went off to college. We ended up talking every day and shared the most intimate parts of our lives. We started dating in January and it blew up in our faces a week before Valentine's Day due to, shall we say, emotional cheating and interference from a guy friend on her part. Cutting the cord was easy, and I walked out of her apartment crying but then a little while later I started experiencing all the usual feelings I'd seen my friends go through. Previously I shrugged it off as them wallowing in their own self-pity, but I understand how little the platitudes like "there's plenty more out there" really mean when you are single-mindedly focused on that one person. I hit the gym, lost 20lbs, am in the best shape of my life and am working harder than ever. But still feel incomplete, even after some good rebound sex with another girl. I also wonder, does my wanting her back have to do with me really liking her or my own feelings of rejection and loss? Focus: Share your first, or worst breakup story. How long did it take you to recover? What did you do to get over it?