Bitches, man

3rd Grader Compiles The Most Complete List of Bitches Every Created



There are 5 pages (should be 6, one is missing) of these. Some favorites:

6) got all the mouth but can't step bitch

16) bitches who think their man love them but get pregnant then be left alone.

37) same wearing clothes each day bitches.

Focus: Is this a complete list - got some more bitches? Also, seriously, was this written by a THIRD grader?

 

It may have been dictated to a 3rd grader as they wrote it down. But unless 3rd graders are waaaay more advanced in their learning than when I was a kid, I doubt "Dick ridin bitches" is anything on an 8 year old's mind.

 

First thing that came to mind was this:



"The Playa Haters Ball is an opportunity to hate on a diverse array of mark-ass marks, trick-ass marks, punk bitches n' skip scap skanks n' skalliwags. Hos, heifers, hee-haws, n' hoolihoos!"

The kid must be a young Chappelle fan.

 

Bitches that can't or won't cook.
Bitches that can cook, but don't never cook enuff for you.
Bitches that wont bring you a beer when they are on their way back from the kitchen anyways.
Bitches that can't or don't work.
Bitches that think your paycheck is "our money" and her paycheck is "her money".
Bitches that don't have an opinion or won't make a decision.

 

Really, I mean she starts tapping a dry barrel near the end.
Uncreative Bitches? Tall Bitches, short bitches?

That and the shitty grammar make me say this;

I disregard your bitches and substitute my own!

 

Can't hang with the streets bitches

Ain't shit but hos and tricks bitches.

 

In 4th grade my friends used to make sex jokes all the time. Granted I had no idea what they were talking about, but still. One of my friends once asked me as we did long division problems "Which girl in our class you wanna see bi?"
"Uh...(having no idea what that even meant)...Whitney?"
"...yeeeah!"

I sometimes explain my 4th grade experience as similar to South Park. I came home from school so many times and asked my mom things like "What does fuck mean?"

 

"Concetied bitches"

Although it's spelled wrong, I don't think a 3rd grader would use that word.
Nice list though.

 

Won't get out the way bitches

 

The only TiB bitches are the bitches who won't post their tits/ass.

 

C'mon girl, don't talk down to yourself like that, I'm sure you have a lovely personality.

 

You think a few PMs asking for tit posts are hard to deal with? How about countless reps asking me to either post on the tit thread OR the beard thread to confirm which of these two things I am? AT LEAST THEY KNOW YOU'RE A GIRL AND ACCEPT YOU FOR IT

Besides, you want me to post all the secret reps you've given me? Methinks you don't know which way the tire swings on your tree, missy.

 

Call me a TiB bitch.

Focus: There is no way a third grader wrote this. If one did, I am definitely impressed. My depravity and vulgarity did not kick in until fifth grade at least.