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Ask an Escort.

Discussion in 'All-Star Threads' started by shegirl, Jan 14, 2010.

  1. scootah

    scootah
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    Do your friends spend a lot of time laughing at the many double entendres that come up in ordinary conversation, in light of your job?
     
  2. Beefy Phil

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    Heh. Every day is Hump Day.
     
  3. Calvinism

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    Should still be lurking

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    Whats the policy on spitting/swallowing?


    Edited because I apparently can't read.
     
  4. scootah

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    Srsly? Did you read her very first post in the thread by any chance?

    Fuck I miss being able to ban people.
     
  5. huh

    huh
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  6. scootah

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    You two are cousins and siblings aren't you?
     

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  7. ssycko

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    I think what "huh" was asking was for a porn involving her and a bunch of dudes of different colors surrounding her.

    Just thinkin'.
     
  8. scootah

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  9. Nettdata

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    Stay on topic, shall we?
     
  10. Pussy Galore

    Pussy Galore
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    Disturbed

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    2005 Mustang GT. I've spent too much time listening to Clutch [specifically music off From Beale Street to Oblivion] and imagining myself wearing Daisy Dukes and driving around in a convertible. I'd get a Challenger, but I've got to have that convertible top.

    You're absolutely welcome. I'm not really clear on the first part of your question. The client technically starts things off by booking me in the first place, but I don't think that's what you're getting at. As far as who actually lunges for the other person in order to suck their face off, it's either/or. I'm an aggressive person, but plenty of clients are just as aggressive, so we usually meet in the middle. As for how an appointment goes down, my manager buzzes them into the gate and building, and I let them into the apartment. If it's one of my regulars, I get all chatty, asking about their day and talking about mine. If not, I'm super polite and ask if they'd like something to drink. Once pleasantries are taken care of, I direct them to whichever bedroom we'll be in, mention that they can leave their "gift" on the nightstand if they aren't already doing so, and just kinda go for it. Random tidbit: I always try to position myself so that I can see the clock. Yes, I am a clockwatcher. I'm not obvious about it, but I don't want anyone to feel like I'm handing out freebies. Usually the guys are time conscious, as well, so it's not much of an issue. Once they're done, we get dressed, I let them out, and I clean up and drop the agency's cut into a safe in the back. The end.

    I'm 21. My friends aren't the most mature bunch on the best of days, so whether or not the humor factor has increased since I started my job, I couldn't say. Some of the guys like to ask what my rates are in front of people that don't know me for shock value, and I just play along.

    To each, his or her own. I generally swallow because, well, it's already in my mouth, what's the point of spitting it out now?

    Porn isn't really my style, since I don't do anal, spit roasting, an Eiffel Tower, or really anything sexual involving the inside of my ass or more than one guy at once. Sorry to disappoint. If anyone's looking for a good laugh and a peek at my porno acting skillz though, check out my intro video on the agency website. In fact, just check them all out. I laugh. I cry. I look for another job.

    Just kidding on the last one.

    And as scootah has kindly pointed out for me, I have already listed or linked pretty much everything pertaining to me and my profession. I've been patient thus far with repeat questions, but please please please read through my previous replies before asking something. Even if the previously posted question is worded a bit differently from yours, I may have provided whatever information you're seeking in response to someone else's inquiry. Thanks, y'all. Back to your regularly scheduled programming.
     
  11. Pinkcup

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    Alright. Let's get down to the nitty gritty.

    1. What are you doing during your blowjobs that makes you/others rate them as "excellent"? I need advi....I mean.....this is for research purposes.

    2. Have you ever queefed in front of a client?

    3. When your client walks into the apartment, can you kind of just......tell.....what kind of client he'll be? What I mean is, have you gotten better at assessing people? Are there "types" of clients (he's gonna want a 10 minute blow followed by 35 minutes of missionary, this one is going to want me to deep throat the whole time)?

    4. I know you've covered STD's, but what about H1N1? Do you take precautions for that as well? I imagine that it isn't very sexy to keep a bottle of Purell on the nightstand, but do you?

    5. You say that you offer drinks to new clients (possibly to calm their nerves?). Are you mixing alcoholic drinks, or is this a glass-of-iced-tea kind of deal? If it's the former, who pays for the booze? Can you request that the in-call fridge be stocked with your favorite snacks? I know that I always want to sip on some Coke after swallowing less-than-delightful fluids. And if your client is late, I would think that snacking on carrot sticks (OR MOONPIES!!!!!!!!!) would be better than twiddling your thumbs. Actually, eating Moonpies is better than everything.

    6. Do you fuck to a soundtrack? Or is it silence punctuated by random grunting and sighing?

    7. Edit: AHHH I almost forgot this: Have you ever been with (professionally or in your private life) a screamer? If it was professionally, did you laugh?
     
  12. Pussy Galore

    Pussy Galore
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    Urm. I don't really pay attention to what I'm doing... But I guess it's a lot of tongue-twisting and head-swiveling. I'd do better to give a live performance than try to describe it in writing. Yes, I have queefed before through no fault of my own (it's generally the result of a lot of lube and the guy slipping out, then trying to stick his dick back in too quickly). From what I remember, we've always just ignored it. Or at least, they've ignored it while I laugh hysterically in my head. I can never tell what kind of client they'll be unless I've seen them before, though I can stereotype a bit and say that the Indian ones are always a bit odd, at least in my experience. Beyond Armpit Guy, I have another regular that likes to give me a massage and then kinda rub up against me til he cums. He kisses me on my forehead. I don't get it. As far as H1N1 and most common winter diseases, I've been vaccinated. I wash my hands frequently, at least once before, between, and after each client, as well as using disinfectant mouthwash. There's only so much we can do without just quitting this field. The agency only provides water. I bring my own food and powdered drink mixes, and I hide them so the other hookers don't steal them (we're all very light fingered). I never offer a client anything from my personal stash, though. I'm greedy like that. You want to eat, you should've paid me to be your dinner date instead of your midnight fuck. It would've been cheaper, anyway, and I like to eat. If a guy wants music, we can turn on the radio. Or my iPhone playlist. I usually don't play music, though. It's distracting for me. I get lyrics stuck in my head and my mind wanders. I've never been with a screamer or overt moaner that I can remember. Are there really boys out there that are screamers? If there are, I'd probably get the giggles.

    By the way, shameless personal plug: I've been contracted to write a blog about my ongoing experiences with hookerdom. It'll be up at billedhourly.com. No, the ramblings of a lunatic that are currently up are not mine. I'll probably get my first post up early next week.