We now end our parties (or any gatherings) with it is not over until someone fucks the clown. Kind of like it is not over until the fat lady sings. This particular night started with us normally partying at a bar. My particular group of friends are all in their thirties but one guy went back to college so he occassionally has twenty somethings show up to hang out with us. These twenty somethings are warned that even though we look older we have been known to be a little crazy so they may want to hold their drinks close and their girls closer. One of our buddies had just bought a new house so we headed over there to continue the party. This is where things started to get out of hand. I fell asleep in the recliner for about 20 minutes literally and woke up to insanity. One of our friends who is a professional DJ was almost face first passed out in his equipment with the music blaring. Behind him the 50 something inch TV was playing porn (and we were in a nice home in the suburbs lol). I wake up and stumble outside looking for my husband. Apparently there was a show on the patio. One of our friends who is a freak unbeknowst to us had a backpack full of new silver bullet vibrators that he decided to break out. Another friend of ours took it upon himself to begin diddling one of the college guy's girlfriends with it. At this point a couple other college girls arrive including a chubby girl. The chubby girl then disappears first into the bedroom with one friend who slept with her then into the bathroom with another guy who she gave a BJ. Then the chubby girl walks out and announces she has to leave after only being there approximately an hour and being intimate with two people she had never met before because she had a "gig". I innocently ask what type of gig. Come to find out she was a professional clown! Our friends have still yet to live that down, they are randomly assaulted by circus music when they least expect it. As a side note this particular friend who owned the house still parties with us but no one is allowed at his house any more.
I remember back in high school, one of my buddies thought it was a good idea to pick up a female bum off the street and bring her to a keg party. The rest of the party was nothing memorable, but this lady must have been in her 50's and smelled like urine & booze. She wandered into the kitchen, downed a fifth of Smirnoff straight and ate an entire box of chocolate flavored graham crackers. I was stoned out of my mind, and the site of a bum shovelling graham crackers into her mouth was quite amusing. Until she fell over and passed out on the floor. Quick thinkers we were, we threw her in the back of my friend Ben's van conversion and had him drop her off at the emergency room.
I'm a fairly quiet person. My favorite parties are honestly the ones where 7 or 8 of us hang out, drink too much and play video games. Drunken Wii Sports Resort bowling is a thing of beauty because people start to unnecessarily trash-talk and it's hilarious.
I'd substitute Wii Sports with Super Smash Brothers Brawl and you'd have my ideal get together. Of course, you'd have to stop people from being cheap whores and using Marth. I also like UFC or boxing fight nights. Nothing like having good friends get together, have some drinks, and watching a great fight. I'm still partial to boxing, there's nothing like when a great fight unfolds before your eyes. Last good boxing fight night for me was Williams - Martinez II. Short fight, but man, it was a case of who would land thier left hook first.