I found out something very important about myself last night when I accidentally got drunk while cooking dinner with my brother. It was one of those moments in your life where you look back 10 years from now and say "Whoa. That was really something". I'll remember this day for as long as I shall live. For yesterday, March 25, 2010, was the day that I found out that Bob Seger's "The Fire Inside" makes me want to dance like the kid from "A Charlie Brown Christmas". So yeah, I think I'm going to have lunch beers to celebrate this momentous occasion.
The song came on, that kid popped up in my head, and for the next 5 minutes, I was at peace with the world. Seriously, play this song, scroll back up, and just look at that kid. Tell me you don't want to do that.
Great song, probably my favorite of his. Sounds more like Springsteen style than Seger, because most of what I've heard of Seger is that his music is much mellower than that. Recently I've been craving beer around this time of the morning (hey, it's late morning at least). It's probably because I haven't really worked in 3 months and I'm getting lazy.
Is it bad that I mixed a screwdriver at 8am and drank as I got ready for work? Shower Screwdriver? How can that be bad?
No way man. I have a hard enough time typing as we all know. This shit is taking forever and now that I'm here I really regret having it. There is a reson I've never done it before*. Damn life. *Okay okay maybe once but trust me it's not the norm and now I know why.
That's why you like me, I'm easy. Now I have a headache. You know what they say makes one go away right?
This? I also know what it's like to accidentally get drunk. I accidentally get drunk once or twice a week, when i accidentally stop at the bar or liquor store on the way home from work, then several bottles spontaneously fall off the shelves and empty themselves into my gullet. In fact, I accidentally had a beer at lunch today, and I'm shortly going to leave the office and accidentally drink a few Red Bull and vodkas.
I wonder if the local Catholic priest would be irritated if I went and confessed that I went to karaoke with a bunch of Asian people yesterday. Sober. This dirty feeling won't be going away for a while. After the 10th sappy Disney song, I knew what hell was.
Nice. That shit syncs up for a little bit a time. And now, of course, every time I hear that song, I will think of that. It's like Pink Floyd and The Wizard of Oz or something. . .
Thank goodness because clearly, I spent all my money on booze. I'll happily accept a freebie. Will you make sure I leave with my clothes on this time? I thought Fridays were suppose to be good/fun days. Today blows. Boo.
For God's sake, just get a room. Wait. Scratch that idea...we don't need anymore gigantic pimps stomping the Earth.
I'm thinking tonight it's time to inaugurate my little cousin into drunkenhood. She's at the age I was when I first got silly. Any suggestions what I should get the little one drunk off of?
So you've got a short, high school aged, Canadian teetotaler who you are looking to corrupt? Do they make Maple flavored Boones Farm or MD in pony sizes? Or better yet, is Aunt Jemima fermentable?
Pretty much, yes. I figure it's best if she gets drunk her first time with a responsible person who knows what they're doing when it comes to being drunk*. *I am the worst possible person to get her drunk.
Whats wrong with straight Jack? If she starts of with something painful, everything else will taste like awesome. For a girl though, I'd say 3 parts jack, 1 part coke, that should tone it down a bit.
You get back and this is all you've got? Did they take your country brainpower along with your anal virginity in jail or what? Zip it bumpkin or you will!