I will pay anyone on here $50 to go to the wedding I have to go to this afternoon in my place. Just stand around awkwardly and scowl at strangers and no one will be able to tell the difference.
Whose wedding? Any good looking groomsmen? Is it an open bar? Will there be titties? I may be willing, depending on the circumstances.
A guy I work with who tops the scales at a solid 300 proving there really is someone for everyone. Either that or, since the bride is in her late 40s, it proves that some women will do anything to get married. No idea on the groomsmen or the titty situation, but yes there will be an open bar. Also, the reception is being held at a barbecue joint. For reference see the aforementioned 300 pound remark. EDIT: You'll also have to sit through a full on Catholic wedding ceremony complete with Mass. If there's a news report about God smiting a church because one person had the audacity to walk inside of it, that'll be my fault.
I'm your huckleberry. Free drinks? I'll choke on all that incense. Make lewd comments to the bride's mom, and wink at granny, slap the groom's titties. Stuff my pockets with as much bbq as the blue rental tux can hold, then knock the flower girl over as I stumble out the door. No one will have any idea that dashing rogue wasn't Noland. More weddings need rum buckets. It's weird when you bring your own. Right? Is that awkward? In other news, Mike Tyson is getting his own animated show. Brilliant.
Yeah, slow is good today. The fire next door is no where near as intense as it was before, and the temps are dropping to 10°C tonight, the high winds from earlier have died off, and there's some chilly humidity in the air. Good way to help kill a forest fire. Spent the day napping, watching F1 qualifying, napping some more, painted a floor, replaced a kitchen faucet, and now am just enjoying a nice, slow bbq on the deck with some nice red wine. Have some nice Woodford Reserve (old Master's Collection) on deck, along with a nice cigar. Great way to spend the night, if you ask me.
Slow night at work, too. What a crapshoot. One of our renters down the street got broken into tonight. So that's cool....
Yeah, I just came here a few minutes ago and it was one of the few times I'd ever come here and there wasn't a new post in the drunk thread. I woke up this morning and my knee hurt. It's gotten progressively worse throughout the day. I went to go see some doggies at adoption stands. I'm sort of practicing I guess for when we get a dog for real in September. Right now I am having a martini and watching World's Dumbest. Speaking of which, I just looked up and the TV is doing that strange discoloration thing that it's been doing periodically since we bought it a week ago. I'm gonna have to call tech support tomorrow, I freaking hate talking to people. So earlier today I was meandering through IMDB, and I ended up recalling the show Gimme A Break. That show was on apparently on six years. And based on meandering through youtube, I probably watched all of those seasons. And yet I had completely forgotten about it. That's quite an accomplishment, to be that completely mediocre. Yes people, that was the most boring post on TiB ever. You're welcome.
I accidentally bought 6 sex toys tonight. My intention was only to buy one particular thing, but then I kept stumbling across all of these crazy deals and I kept thinking to myself that it was too good to pass up and it was something I'd always wanted anyway so why not? It was probably the most Jewish thing I've ever done.
Climbed Mount Washington yesterday. I'm a pretty seasoned hiker, but that kicked my ass. My legs are jelly.
I am not a hiker. I'm a walker. But, The Husband likes hiking and I'm not opposed so a-hiking we will go! I have a feeling it's going to kill me.
Hiking is fun if you do it relatively slowly. I hate people who rush through trails. It's scenery, damn it! My favorite trip ever was hiking through the Adirondack Mountains with the Boy Scouts, both in winter and summer. Winter was a clusterfuck because none of us had crampons. Summer was just fucking gorgeous. Also, they separated us into the Kids Who Knew What They Were Doing and the Dumbshit Retards. The former group hiked from campsite to campsite, while the latter stayed at Marcy Dam and did day trips. As it turns out, the Retards decided that they didn't want to use the bear canisters, and raccoons took all of their food. The adults thought this was hilarious. We came back to Marcy Dam after five days and were beset by retards who begged us for jerky and trail mix. Fuckers.
My biggest problem is I tend to over prepare my pack since I'm paranoid from horror stories of rapid weather changes, especially on places like Mt Washington. The summt was 60 degrees with a light breeze. The descent took 5 hours and was grueling and some parts required me to throw my pack to the ground and climb down a cliff face. Awesome views though.
I know what you mean about over-packing. 30 pounds with a comfortable pack close to sea level over flat gorund is nothing. 30 pounds at altitude, climbing up a mountain? Holy fuck. Hiking's fun, though. I got invited on a trip to Kilimanjaro the other day. Anyone ever been? I love all things mountain, but Kilimanjaro isn't something that's really been on my bucket list.
I haven't, but a friend has. Basically it takes about a week and you can't just hike it, you have to go with paid guides that takes a group up in leisurely way. The guides also set up the tent, cook the food, and carry the majority of the gear. Costs about $2000, not counting the price of travel to get there. It was referred to as "Glamping" (glamour-camping) rather than hiking.