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6/16/17 WDT NSFW

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Jun 16, 2017.

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  1. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    My parents love to travel, and the best country to travel in is America. It's not as clean and picturesque as Canada, but it has EVERYTHING. It's a country where I can go see the Grand Canyon in perfect September weather, drive to Flagstaff 100 miles away and go skiing two hours later.

    My parents wanted to see America via the roads. So we did the PCH drive from Vancouver (the Oregon coast was a knockout like none other). Northern Cali is the TITS. Loved every inch of it, the people were awesome. Once you are in Southern Cal, everyone has Aspergers.

    We also drove from here to D.C through the Virginas which was a fucking GORGEOUS mountain trip. Also Phoenix to Tahoe(most beautiful drive of my life), drove I75 from Port Huron to Florida. That is an amusing drive. As the weather gets hotter by the hour, the accents get more awesome. By the time you get to Georgia they have those boisterous, super-giddy southern accents that could cheer you up even if you were just taken hostage for a week. Then you arrive in Florida, which is unfortunately full of Florida People. Rural people in America I loved meeting. Rural people in Florida scared the living fuck out of us.

    A friend of mine bought a Harley a year ago to quell his midlife crisis. He says he wants to ride the Tail Of The Dragon. I said that he has two kids and to stop being an asshole.
     
  2. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Give him two days on the bike and I'm sure he'll be begging for a roadside motel and a rental car. Hard miles on a bike are hard, no way to get around that
     
  3. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Back when I had a bike, I had a friend who thought the epitome of cool would be to have a hard tail.

    I had a Katana, my buddy had a BMW GS... we laughed our asses off on our first "> 20 km" group ride where he was almost crying in pain. He even tried to wear a kidney belt to help, but nope... didn't help.

    After that he only joined us for rides to the local Starbucks.
     
  4. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    [​IMG]

    Help. Now that I know Trump wears tightie whities I can't stop imagining him in only that.
     
  5. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    He seems like a "Depends" kind of guy to me... so just imagine him with incontenance.... it would explain a lot, if you ask me.
     
  6. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    What if all those weird random pauses in his speeches are when he's peeing in his diaper and he can't concentrate?
     
  7. toddamus

    toddamus
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    I'm speechless, I'm not that funny to begin with but he looks like a member in a retirement community wearing depends
     
  8. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Disturbingly plausible.

    [​IMG]
     
  9. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    And the hat, though, right?
     
  10. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    Well, I didn't think it was possible to make this visual worse but CONGRATULATIONS.
     
  11. toddamus

    toddamus
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    The hat is what makes things the worst? I would think other things in that photo would be the worst, but hey, to each their own.
     
  12. toddamus

    toddamus
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    So I booked a hotel for this weekend for a fly fishing trip. While booking the hotel, the online form asked me for a formal title. I chose DR, why not....
     
  13. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Fucking lame.... couldn't be a bit more creative?

    How about Duke, or Count, or His Royal Highness?
     
  14. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Those weren't more choices, it was mr, mrs, ms, dr....If I had a choice I would've gone with Count Toddamus, or maybe Lord Toddamus, I kind of like the sound of that.
     
  15. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Should have gone with "Ms."... better fit than Dr, if you ask me.
     
  16. toddamus

    toddamus
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    If it gets me a better rate I'd do it.
     
  17. dieformetal

    dieformetal
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    Hurricanes Are My Bitch

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    I tried booking a hotel 10-some-odd years ago as "Lord Valklaine of the Northern Lands"...didn't quite work out
     
  18. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    It's policy of many 1% bike gangs (including Hells) to go with the "Rough ride" on their bikes and always ride hard tail. On a "lifestyle" based around a motorcycle. And those who are still alive in those gangs regret that rule like a motherfucker. Not a single biker from their "golden age" walks erect, I shit you not.
     
  19. abneretta

    abneretta
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    Shenanigator

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    My daughter painted my sons fingernails. I have no issue with him wanting them painted, but jesus christ if they didn't make a mess. So they went to bed early tonight after I got them all cleaned up.

    Now I'm having a glass of wine which is a bad idea when I have to get up for work at 3 am.
     
  20. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    I like getting the inquiries where they try to bend what the actual situation is. I had this convo with my offspring last night:

    Her: "Daddy, sharpies say they write on anything. Why don't they write on fur?"

    Me: (pause) "Were you trying to draw on the cat?"

    Her: "Not exactly."

    ...Because technically she was trying to WRITE on the cat. Children are like tiny little barristers who use any loophole they can to avoid facing the music.
     
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