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4/29/16 WDT NSFW

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Apr 29, 2016.

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  1. shegirl

    shegirl
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    Redemption Seeking Whore

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    Today is:

    NATIONAL SHRIMP SCAMPI DAY – Now that's what I want to have for dinner.

    NATIONAL ARBOR DAY – Is this the go plant a tree Arbor Day?

    NATIONAL ZIPPER DAY – Boys be careful when zipping.

    NATIONAL HAIRBALL AWARENESS DAY – WTF? Wait a second, is it possible humans get them too? Moving on.

    My coworker told me yesterday of this great idea she has for a business, mobile coffee/expresso and such. She went on to explain it'd be out of a van and have a set schedule of locations and times. So like a Roach Coach, for coffee. Could work.

    Have you ever had an idea or invention that you thought or maybe even pursued a patent? What was or is it? Did it ever pan out? Are you a millionaire because of it?
     
  2. Clutch

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    I imagine it was more of a problem in the 70s.
     
  3. Misanthropic

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    In 5th grade, as part of the "advanced" class, our teacher gave us an assignment to research, and inform the other kids about, Arbor Day. So three of us wrote a play, that we then performed for the school.

    About Arbor Day.

    The high point was me losing focus when "Granddad" was telling us about the origins of Arbor day, and forgetting my line.
     
  4. CharlesJohnson

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    The first of May is apparently World Naked Gardening Day.

    So who wants to learn about pollination? HEY OH.

    What naked gardening may look like:

    [​IMG]
    SG WARNING: TEABAG AHEAD. SHAME ON YOU BLACK JESUS.
    [​IMG]

    On second thought forget this holiday.
     
  5. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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  6. Flat_Rate

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  7. Currer Bell

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    If ever there was a day meant for a Bill the Cat comic, it would be this day.

    [​IMG]
     
  8. Misanthropic

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    "socially mandated time and space for self reflection"

    This dumb twat thinks that this is what maternity leave is? If I even suggest this to my wife, who spent her socially mandated time and space for self reflection sleeping 2 to 3 hours a night at 20 minute intervals, undergoing radical hormonal changes, with her internal organs shifting slowly back into place while dealing with the ambiguous needs of a parasitic pink larvae, she will fucking kill me.
     
  9. GTE

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    This might be more appropriate for the automotive thread or maybe even the RANT thread but am I being unreasonable here?

    There is a car that I'm interested in in Southern CA (I live in Norcal). I talk to the guy several times, get everything set up, agree on $22k and buy the airfare for this Sunday. I go to the bank to withdraw the money but all they have available is $10k. I'll have to drive to two other locations and then have the wife pull a grand out of her account. It's Friday and end of the month. I can't leave work for 1.5 hours to drive around to hit other branches. I call the guy and tell him I can come down with $10k and a certified cashier's check. I say that obviously I really am GTE or else I couldn't even get on the plane. He says no. I offer to let him take all my information off my driver license down. He says no. I offer to give him the $10k cash and the cashier's check and hold the title until it clears and he still says no. I ask if he has full coverage on the car. He does. So I tell him that he'll have $10k of my cash and if the certified cashier's check doesn't clear, he can claim the car as stolen and get paid out. There is zero risk for him.
     
  10. Rush-O-Matic

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    All of that sounds perfectly reasonable. But what he knows is you agreed on terms, and now you're changing them at the end. Alarm bells.

    You could add that some people at TiB can vouch for you. See if that helps.
     
  11. Clutch

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    I'm sure that trying to get on an airplane with $22,000 in cash would probably lead to a situation involving a windowless room and a pair of rubber gloves.
     
  12. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    Yes, the first year is a wonderful year. Four hours sleep max, less than that for the first three months. Projectile vomit in your face. Eight diapers a day, house interior vandalized like a scat porn set yadda yadda yadda.... babies are cute and adorable and you love yours to death but the first year is a mental Parris Island and life is the mud you lie face-down in while being berated by men without foreheads. It's a thing my wife dealt with for an extended period that I would wish on my worst enemy. And now apparently people feel entitled to that experience. Or at least the cash part. The rest involves sitting on your ever-expanding ass.

    Choke on it.
     
  13. Crown Royal

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    Okay granted, but what if that was a part of a master plan to get somebody's fingers up your ass?
     
  14. effinshenanigans

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    Can't wait to be a dad in October...

    In other news, Ford Models recently began occupying a floor in my office building. Which is great, because now I have a reason to rub an erection against someone in the elevator.
     
  15. Rush-O-Matic

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    It costs less than $22K for that. So I've heard.

    Are you saying you work in some sort of oppressive environment where a "reason" is needed for that?
     
  16. effinshenanigans

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    I think the big difference now is that they'll ask if I'm a photographer or agent before breaking out the mace.
     
  17. Crown Royal

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    You NEVER need a reason for that. Ever.
     
  18. dixiebandit69

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    I wasn't sure if I should post this here, or in the Serious Thread, but since I don't take these people's concerns very seriously, I'll put it here.

    http://www.scarymommy.com/peanut-allergy-school/?utm_source=CM

    Have any of you parents out there had to deal with "nut-bans" in your kids' schools?
    Luckily, Li'l Bandit was born just early enough to avoid this bullshit (and it was non-existent when I was growing up), but I have a friend who works at one of the middle schools down here, and she can't eat trail mix anymore because there's a "nut-ban" at her school, which really pisses her off.

    Anyway, the woman who wrote the above article sounds like an iron-cunted bitch, demanding that the non-allergic of the world bend over backwards to accommodate her genetically defective daughter. And because of her tone, I actually WANT her precious snowflake to eat a Reese's cup by accident and turn purple.

    This ought to piss the bitch off:
    Peanut Butter.jpg

    EDIT:
    You ought to say that you ARE a photographer, ask her back to your studio, do some nude photo-shoots, and share the results here.
     
  19. sharkhead nachos

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    I'll just leave this here then

     
  20. TX.

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    Prince was way ahead of his time. He was appreciating dat ass years before it was mainstream.
     
    #20 TX., Apr 29, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2016
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