Another year, another death pool. If anyone had predicted Whitney Houston this time last year, I'd hook them up with 1000 rep points. Alas, she flew under the radar. Or, if you like, slipped under the water. Have at it - who doesn't make 2014?
Abe Vigoda-- I feel lucky this time. Machaulay Caulkin-- You saw him. "Death warmed over" is describing him too politely. Willem Defoe saw that picture and said "Holy shit, I'm on meth, blonde, and who did my make-up? I look like shit!!!" You're going DOWN this year, son. The grim reaper will get you a lot sooner before the Wet Bandits finally do. Pat Robertson-- my "fingers crossed" pick, a death void of sadness that can only aid mankind and common sense.
Arethra Franklin - I'm amazed she didn't die in the past year George HW Bush - Once a German newspaper publishes your obituary, you have an expiration date.
Hillary Clinton: I got’s me a feelin. Lindsay Lohan: I suspect her clocks ticked. Stephen King: The horror. Betty White: This will sadden me.
No Lindsay Lohan guesses? Zsa Zsa Gabor-how she is still alive I have no idea. Edit: LTMS beat me to it.
Jimmy Carter Hugh Hefner-he's 86, and he married a 26 year old. Call it a fucking day already. I just hope these four go out in a battle royale: Dick Cheney Lou Ferrigno Ric Flair Terry Bradshaw
Nelson Mandela - In and out of hospital, he's on his last legs. The Queen - Going for the top here but I reckon Charlie is going to slip something into her drink so he can have his day witht he crown. Any one of The Rolling Stones - Surely the number is being called for at least one of them.
Hugo Chavez looks as though he already has one foot on a banana peel. Maybe his death will cause his old buddy Fidel Castro to die from a broken heart. Margaret Thatcher: Why not throw her into the mix? Courtney Love: If I could pick just one Wilford Brimley: Die-uh-beetus will finally get him after he forgets to check his blood sugar and forgets to check it often Charlie Sheen: my dark horse
I'll take Oprah in the random black celebrity that dies young. We'll say a bum ticker. Hillary Clinton. Both of the Clintons look rough but if I can only have one Clinton I'd rather keep slick Willy. Morgan Freeman hoping I'm wrong. For some reason I think Prince Charles goes before mummy dearest. Lohan cuz its gotta happen soon. Board members: Netdaddy because Dcc finally gets tired of his noncompliance in the whole lotion on skin department. Crown dies of a broken ass. Parker gets beaten to death by a guy who's tired of being in the friend zone while Parker inflicts lasting damage on his bffs sacred flower with his trowserville slugger. Bundy Bear gets eaten/poisened/trampled/fireanted/drop beared. Basically he continues the dubious health choice of living in Australia.
Justin Bieber - Please God Lindsay Lohan - It's gonna happen sooner than later Michael Douglas - Catherine Zeta Jones is gonna fuck that old man to death at some point. But they'll call it a stroke or a heart attack. Christian Bale - He's gonna go the Heath Ledger route. Get too involved in a character, lose his mind. Jack Nicholson - maybe while getting ready to go to a Lakers Game Jessica Simpson - In childbirth (please, no, I'm wrong) Betty White - she's had a fantastic run Dave Letterman - heart attack (also a fantastic run) Nicole Kidman - (crazy accident) Tacking on to others guesses that I believe are correct: Hillary Clinton - Brain Cancer (if you believe the grocery store rags) QE2 - she's just so OLD. Is William the heir at this point? Has Charles just been totally discounted?
My dad and I did a bet pool with money and all one year. As a joke, I put the name of the guy who ran the thing. He got hit by a bus 3 months later. Anyway: GHW Bush is toast Carter is toast as well. It is not a good year to be an ex president. Castro (it is about time) Prince Philip Leonard Nemoy David Hyde Pierce hasn't been looking too well lately. Lohan Rhianna at the end of Chris Brown's bat
Double Dictator Demise: Fidel Castro Hugo Chavez Lindsay Lohan Kirk Douglas Zsa Zsa Gabor Stephen Hawking
I was going to list Chavez, Fidel, Carter, and GHW Bush but they've been done repeatedly... So Entertainment Rosie o' Donnell; morbid obesity and it's related ills is a killer. Honey Boo Boo and/or family member; see above. One of the remaining Beatles, Rolling Stones, or original Lynard Skynard members. Those dudes have got to be getting up there in years by now. Ozzy Osborne; dude fried his mind years ago, and you know he's got to be a physical wreck by now too. Politics Bashar al-Assad; killed by rebel forces much like Gaddafi. Kim Jong-un; going out on a limb here, if the North Koreans keep pushing their luck shits gonna hit the fan sooner or later. Death by smart bomb.
Angelina Jolie is going to starve to death or have an unfortunate accident on one of her charity trips. Kim Kardashian, Ke$ha, Lindsey Lohan- just dreaming here. Hugh Hefner for obvious reasons.
Joe Jackson Nelson Mandela Dick Cheney Aretha Franklin Betty White From TiB... wait, is toytoy still alive?
How come no one is throwing out the demises of our fellow idiots? I always thought the hypebolic death scenarios created around other board members was the best part of the death threads.
McSmallstuff - A stress induced stroke relating to his terror children and the authorities will find him lying half on, half off the couch with his appendages half eaten by his now rabid children.
I already defied some TiBers' expectations by surviving into 2013, so that's something. I'll again go with Nelson Mandela punching his ticket - I was pretty damn close with my guess on that front last year. He's been in hospital for the last month. I'll also stick with Berlusconi and Cheney again. Berlusconi will probably fuck an underage hooker to (his) death, while if anything touched Cheney's penis (including Mrs. Cheney), he'd probably have a stroke or his 19832378234th heart attack*. *Even though it's obvious Cheney has no heart. Yes, old joke, moving on... I'll now pick some others: Don Rickles - this would suck, because he's awesome. Probably a stroke. Clint Eastwood - heart attack brought on from crazy reality show experiences. Lance Armstrong - what a stupid cock he is. Hoping for the irony of cancer, but I'll pick suicide for this one. David Pleat - the worst association football commentator ever. Also managed Spurs, briefly. Dies from inhaling his own farts. Kenny Dalglish - finally realizes what a mistake returning to football management was for him. Heart attack (he had a triple bypass a few years ago).
I am not reading others until I post mine so I won't be tainted.....my list 1. George Bush Sr. 2. Betty White 3. George Michael 4. Zsa Zsa Gabor 5. MacCaulay Culkin