I'm a dirty west cost hipster and I'm drinking a great local IPA called the Hoptologist for now. Bout to watch The Grey with the Girlfriend, apparently its more than just Liam Neeson fighting wolves, I guess.
Money is on you not enjoying that movie, as I have never met anybody (including myself) who liked it.
I had to finish a handle of Crown Royal that was left in my apartment. Costco is a dangerous place my friends. That shit mixes too well with a bit of ginger ale.
I've always liked it in small amounts, you don't find it too sweet? Especially mixing with a soda seems like it would get up to Southern Comfort levels of sugar.
Ftfy Look, I drink regular Miller Lite, but I don't pretend it's "really good beer" - it tastes decent and it's low calorie. That's all.
So the woman who I haven't necessarily broken up with but also haven't spoken to in a month apparently tried to Skype me at 2 in the morning. I was, of course, asleep. How embarrassing for her. I mean, I miss her rockin' tits. But I don't miss fighting about how I need to think about her feelings when her cat jumps on my balls.
She still has your balls? Maybe you should get them back before you break up with her. Mine are apparently a nice set of earrings. I haven't seen them in a while.
Of all the macros, it's the best hands down. I'd take almost any micro over high life in a second, but sometimes I don't feel like spending $8 for a sixer.
Speaking of pets jumping on your balls. My dog did the other night. She usually comes in and jumps on the bed at like 3 in the morning. The other night she came barreling in my room as usual and dove towards my bed. It was pitch black and she did a straight shot to the back of my sack as I had my back turned to the direction she was jumping from. She fell back to the ground and I writhed in pain. She made it unobstructed on her second attempt. Fucking bitch.
Squirrels in our attic. Time for some target practice. Apparently the weather makes them think it's mating season, and I have an AR-15 that's about to be a major cock block.
Are you implying that you intend to fire an AR-15 in your attic? Please just sit silently in the living room, and with every thump, rustle, and scratch you fire several rounds into the ceiling.
I was awoken at 3:00 am, out of a rare solid pregnant slumber, by the Mr. puking in our spare bathroom SINK. He had returned from his friend's birthday party at a local bar and had, as usual, made increasingly poor beverage choices. I played the good little wife role and put him to bed, on his side, and cleaned up the mess. This morning I woke him and suggested a Mexican breakfast to cure his hangover, during which I encouraged beers to ease his pain. Now, fully lulled into a false sense of security and buzzed, we returned home where he assumed he would be free to return to sleep the remaining hangover off when I promptly reminded him of the 5+ hours of yard work he promised to me. Guess who is hating life, and me, right now? I'm all about that long con.
Fuck you!!! (Good joke though.) No, I'm watching out the windows for those pesky brown fuckers while tweet baiting celebrities with #MakeAFilmUncomfortable
But seriously, it's a 22lr conversion AR right? Again I don't know if this is just another poorly worded/executed sentence or if ROTN really means he's going to use a high powered rifle on small rodents in the close quarters of his attic?
It's a 5.56 AR, and I'm going to use it in the safe quarters of my yard. Eliminate them while grocery shopping, then patch up their home just in case I didn't see a few.