I call it our "Texan Exchange:" no stage income tax, but you have to deal with the hellacious allergies. After the doctor bills, it ends up about even. At work, I've heard at least a half dozen ways to make hot toddies, each one of them sworn to work on their mother's grave. When the mosquitoes are bad (and when they are in season, which is 11 months out of the year, they are ALWAYS bad), mixing up vinegar and baking soda into a heavy paste and applying it to the sting will render it painless. It may be placebo, but it works. For hangovers, for me it's always "hair of the dog." Not so much that it eases my going back into sobriety, but rather that the hair of the dog expedites my going back into drunkenness. And once you're back there, you don't care; buy now, pay later shit. I always regret doing hair of the dog, because it always makes it vastly worse in the long run (actual cure, for me, is a helping dose of B12 vitamin). And yet, I always swear by it. Focus: "Old school" cures and old wives tales. What have you found that works? Alt Focus: What absolutely doesnt work?
Bumpdydumptydoo. Focus: Nothing brings me out of a hangover like bacon. I can have all the electrolytes, water, or more booze I can get my hands on, but freshly crisped bacon works like no other. Also, lemon water tends to sooth the stomach whenever I have a disgusting flood of diarrhea. **Everyone start suggesting threads! We will greenlight them, so get those suggestions in there.**
For hiccups I've found that drinking some bitters, followed by some sugar, seems to work. I also find for some headaches, a warm washcloth across the eyes/forehead can help.
If you kink your neck, which is horrible, dampen a medium-sized towel, zap it in the microwave until hot (30 or 40 seconds), twist it and wrap it around your neck. Do it again when the heat is gone. To get rid of hiccups, hold your breath. No, KEEP holding it in, pussy. Till you nearly pass out. They're gone. Every time. My hangover cure is two cans of coke and a pack of headache powder. Very effective.
Hey look! It's the reverse RMMB! Instead of us stealing every thread idea from Cracked articles (and reddit), they're stealing article ideas from us. Posted today: 5 Shockingly Unexpected Cures for Common Health Problems
Hiccups? Douse a slice of lemon with Worcestershire and suck on it deeply. For everything else, there's ibuprofen.
Alt-Focus: Tylenol for hangovers. This may be a bit of a PSA here, but the absolute thing you can do to your liver after a night of drinking is taking a tylenol the next day. I've heard ICU nurses describe that drug as taking a cheese grater to the orgran. What does work for hangovers, at least in college, a Jamba Juice and an Adderall. That shit will get you moving.
A bacon sandwich is the best way to cure a hangover. The bacon for the grease and the protein and the bread for soaking up alcohol. The best way to AVOID a hangover is taking a multi-vitamin before you pass out. Toothpaste, apple cider vinegar, egg whites, baking soda, witch hazel, and a raw potato all get rid of acne. You don't have to mix all of these things together. Each one of these items will do it. (From a resident at the nursing home I work at) putting icy hot on your hands gets ride of liver spots. According to my only-have-to-see-him-once-a-year, try-to-avoid-this-person-at-all-costs cousin, the best way to cure hiccups is to stick a finger up your ass.
Two aspirin before going to bed seems to prevent hangovers for me. An ounce, er, 650 mg, of prevention . . . Of course, the fact that I no longer personally inhale 3-4 pitchers of margaritas in an evening may have some bearing.