Rant: At my mom's for Easter dinner. Which while I love my mother dearly, my stepdad almost always drinks too much & becomes an asshole. Rave: Stepdad is a truck driver, and leaves out tonight, so can't drink! Rant: He's still an asshole. And my SO bailed out on me for being a buffer. Rave: SO bailed on the conditions that he meet me for margaritas when I'm done here*, and take me fishing tomorrow! *And yes, tequila makes my clothes fall off.
Rave: Beautiful spring day in NC and I'm about to take a walk in the woods and burn one. Life is good.
Rant: Fuck Comparative Chordate Anatomy. Fuck it in whatever type of excretory passage for undigested food material it has.
Rant: CHEAP VACUUM CLEANERS. What the hell possessed me to buy this cheap piece of shit? I spent half an hour disassembling it, just so that I could get the beater head turning again. Found out the motor was about the same size as one you'd expect to see in a high-level Lego set. No wonder the stupid thing doesn't suck worth a damn. Rave: My birthday is less than one month away. Guess what I'm asking for as a present? EDIT: Vacuums are perfectly acceptable birthday presents, once you own your own house. See what happens when you get old?
Rave: I have the most foamy toothpaste ever. It's the best. Normally I don't like foamy things, but this is great. Rant: New neighbours again. These ones have a dog. The dog is named Rocky, and he is really cute. Unfortunately for Rocky, his owners leave him out until all hours of the night while he whines. I feel bad. This dog has seriously been crying for a solid 20 minutes now. This is a sad situation. I should buy treats for him for situations like this I think.
Rant: I have to fly to perth tomorrow for work. Rave: Apparently the hot chicks out number the guys quite substantially.
Rave: Long weekend in LA was super fun, and even though the drive back was kind of brutal I made it home in one (albeit sleepy) piece. Weird: Got a facebook message from the guy I lost my virginity to 4 1/2 years ago, apologizing for pretty much ignoring the fact that it ever happened. I don't really know how to respond, and I'm torn between having the better late than never attitude and just wondering why on earth he decided to apologize now.
Rave- Shirtless Joe Budden Rave- Pharoahe monch and Slaughterhouse killed it Rant- Crooked I didnt show
Rave: Best Opening Day EVER. It's a rarity that the fates decide to provide beautiful weather, an exciting game, and a win all on the same day, usually we're thankful to get 2 out of 3. Today it happened. Also it seems like we arrived at every bar just before it got packed. Baseball Tavern...roof deck seats. Who's on First?... big booth near the hot Budweiser girls, Boston Beer Works... table at the windows looking out on the street. Amazing luck and timing. Rant: The fucking "wave". I wanted to violate every stupid motherfucking pseudo-fan douchenozzle that thought it was acceptable to do the wave during the 8th inning when THEIR team is up by a measly run. Now I hate the wave unequivocally but I can understand why it appears during a Saturday day game mid-season when the game is a complete one sided blowout. Not when it's a close game against the division rival. Not when YOUR team is pitching. Stupid motherfuckers.
I turn 26 today! Rant: That means I probably need to start taking my life in some sort of direction. Rave: Cutting out work early to go to opening day! Rant: It's to watch the Nationals. I really wish I was in Cincinnati right now. Rave: Beer will make me forget the first rant. And hopefully the second one.
Rave: As has been duly noted in the drunk thread, I've had a sudden resurgence in playing guitar. Last night I was playing and just couldn't get comfortable with my Gibsons (A Les Paul and an Explorer.) Then I remembered I had an old, cheap Epiphone SG at the spare house. I went up and grabbed it and everything fell into place. It doesn't sound anywhere near as good as a Gibson, but that little thing plays awesomely. I'm starting to think I may just replace the electronics and machine heads to make sure she growls just like my Gibbys. It's not insane to throw $600 worth of electronics into a $150 guitar is it? For those of you that don't play an instrument it's hard to describe just how attached a person can get to a certain instrument. It becomes an extension of your own body and you share every fiber of your being with it. It doesn't matter if it's a premium instrument or a cheap piece of shit. You just somehow bond with the thing. That's the way this SG is. It sounds tinny and has no sustain, but it's as comfortable to me as my mother's hugs. Rant: Toothache. I'm afraid I may have to break down and go to the dentist before this fucker abscesses. My cheek is starting to swell and that's not a good sign. I'm not going to be a toothless hillbilly. I had to endure a month of missing one of my front teeth about 10 years ago when I broke off a front tooth eating an elk burger. I hit a bone in the burger and apparently the bone was stronger then my enamel and my tooth went bye-bye. My dentist was on vacation at the time, so I had to wait a month to get the damage repaired. When I did venture out in public I held my hand over my mouth when I spoke. It was humiliating. To make matters worse while I was waiting for them to complete my fake tooth they fitted me with a temporary one. It fell out more times then I can count and I accidentally swallowed it one night in my sleep. Jesus. 10:30 in the morning and I'm already babbling.
RANT: I haven't been able to get youtube to work for like a week! The site won't even load, and if there's a link to a youtube video somewhere it just doesn't play. What the fucking fuck, how am I supposed to watch funny videos of cats now?? (I didn't change any settings or do anything, it just stopped working. Anyone ever had this happen? My roommate said his was acting funny too, maybe it's a network thing?)
Rave: about six and a half hours til Duke tips off and begins their final march to their destiny -- 2010 NCAA National Champs!!!! I can barely wait. Rant: two and a half more hours of school rave: I'm done teaching for the day. Fuck grading papers, I'm leaving early. Gotta love coaches' schedules.
Rant: My baby cousin came over today and wanted to handle Percy (My parrot.) He's a rather unsociable little creature, but he likes her. He talks when she's here and allows her to pet him through the bars of his cage. She also fed and watered him while I was...ummm...indisposed. The little bastard just barely tolerates me, but he's always loved women so I figured there was no harm in teaching my baby girl how to handle him. How wrong I was. He fucking nailed her with that beak of his. Blood everywhere. To her credit, my cousin didn't pull away or scream when he hit, which would of only made matters worse. I didn't even realize how badly he'd bitten her until I saw all the blood. I have no idea what put a burr up his ass and caused him to do that. I suspect she might have been a wee bit more nervous about handling him then she let on. I've handled enough birds to know that if they even suspect that you're wary of them you're going to get bit. Hard. Double Rant: My toothache is becoming unbearable. It feels like there is a big hole in my jaw connecting straight to my brain. I tried numbing it with whiskey but I kept accidentally swallowing my medicine, which is bad because I become a raging dickhead on hard alcohol. Edit: I forgot the funniest thing about my cousin's visit. She was wearing a shirt with little quotes all over it. I happened to notice that one said "You can't keep your hands off of me." It was written chest high right across her boobs. I fell off the couch laughing and had to explain it to her why I was lying on the floor laughing myself silly. Yeah, I realize that might sound a bit creepy, but she got used to my sense of the absurd long ago.
RANT: Air conditioner is broken and it's cooler out side than in. Repairman will be here tomorrow morning. RANT: We were supposed to leave for the coast in the middle of this week but we can't now because the air conditioner is sucking up our travel money. RANT: When it's hot like this my wife does not want to have sex or be touched in any way. She also looks continually annoyed. RANT: The kids are home from school this week and my youngest is sick. RAVE: At least the kids have been surprisingly well behaved. It's actually been quiet.