Donut rant: <a class="postlink" href="http://www.usatoday.com/story/experience/weekend/lifestyle/2014/05/29/10-best-donut-shops-usa/9721439/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.usatoday.com/story/experienc ... a/9721439/</a> A local shop, Sugar Shack, got put on this list. Normally I'd be all, yay, go local place! But really it is just a big WTF. People rave about this place all the time, but 90% of their donuts are uninteresting to me. They generally make regular iced donuts and then their idea of creativity is to sprinkle chopped up candy bars or cereal on them. The maple bacon one is underwhelming because the bacon is chewy. They have some that are inspired by girl scout cookies (the samoa one being a big seller), but I don't like girl scout cookies. I look at that article and most of the donuts pictured from the other shops sound amazing and really creative. I will be honest and admit that they are on my shit list after they featured some special boozy donut for St. Patricks day and you basically had two choices for trying them - either preorder 2 fucking dozen of them or fight the huge crowd that would be descending on the shop (which has zero parking BTW and no nearby lots - just street parking patrolled regularly by tow trucks) before they sold out of their limited supply.
So a 93 year old WWII vet sky dived into the D Day ceremonies. Apparently he was a paratrooper during the invasion and did this to remind people that just because you're getting old doesn't mean you have to lay down and pass. Amazing guy. Usually I don't get into the human interest pieces, but this is so bad ass. It goes to show aging is about spirit. http://www.cnn.com/2014/06/05/world/europe/d-day-paratrooper-jumps-again/
Oh please. If he was a real badass, he'd have called up a few old Nazis to shoot at him while he did it. What a pussy. *Clearly kidding. I'm 41, and I don't think I'd jump out of a plane even if it was on fire because I'd be so afraid.
I mean between the fire and the inevitable shrieking of the fat woman in flip flops on the flight I'd probably just take my chances outside the plane, with or without a shoot. I imagine the shrieking to be the worst part of a plane crash. I think the real challenge would be for a guy to wear a donut on his dong, pick up a random, and surprise her with it on his erect penis as they disrobe. There was a girl I worked with who supposedly ate a bagel of a guys dong in high school. Not sure if this was before or after that original article ran in cosmo. She was pretty fun to hang out with though.
I really wouldn't be all that impressed. If you get my drift. Because the hole is tiny. My apologies to anyone on the board that could wear that erect. My daughter is graduating today. *iwillnotcryiwillnotcryiwillnotcry* I'll probably cry.
If you want to do one better than a Donut Reveal, I always thought it would be funny to hide something for the guy cavity searching you in customs to find. Like perhaps your high school ring, or a note that said "Getting Warrrmer..." And you'd all laugh heartily.
Oh, Cosmo, you never cease to make me chuckle. Is this sarcasm? Is she just trolling? I hope so. I always wanted to shave my pubes into what resembles a moustache over my dick, and stick some googly eyes above it all. "Hey baby, I've got a friend I'd like you to meet..." Yeah that'll go over well. Did the "dick in a box" once and it was pretty funny, although more challenging to remain hard with my dick stuck in a box* than expected. *cardboard, a shoe box
KK's giving away free doughnuts, y'all. <a class="postlink" href="http://www.krispykreme.com/NationalDoughnutDay" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.krispykreme.com/NationalDoughnutDay</a> Get yo sugar on.
Hey there are other things with very small openings that can receive much bigger objects, why would you think a donuts would be any different HMMMM?
What he's saying is that he definitely put his dick in a doughnut. Also the edit button is way to fucking close to the quote button. Mother of fuck I can't get it together today.
I've never really bragged about my laurels with women as I've mostly been a serial monogamist. Now being engaged it doesn't really matter, but 3 women gave me their numbers this week on separate occasions: once in a bar in Chicago, once at the airport bar, and once at the hotel. 2 of them were engaged, but they handed out their numbers? What the hell? Are women more attracted to men that are engaged? Or is it some self confidence that I am putting forward now that I'm not actively pursuing anyone?
Boyoyoyoing! Sweet! Now, if I can just find a girl who's giving away the nibbling it off my penis part.